We Are Just Giant Man-Boys

Men's Advice Self-Development, Uncategorized

By David Wygant May 23, 2013 186 Shares

Nowadays, dating is more competitive than it’s ever been — download this free report to learn 6 proven skills to stand apart & succeed in the modern dating world.

man boy david wygant A friend of mine—Larry Michel—recently turned 61.

I called him up and I wished him a happy seventh birthday, because six plus one is seven, and that’s how I like to do birthday math.

But in reality, Larry may have the wisdom of a 61-year-old man, but the heart, the soul, and the creativity of a seven-year-old boy.

And that’s a beautiful thing…

We’re so caught up with being adults, with all our responsibilities. We’ve got to go make money; we’ve got to be responsible; we’ve got to make something of ourselves; we’ve got to make everybody proud.

But the people that I know, the people that live beautiful, amazing lives, the people that attract so much abundance, and so many amazing things into their life, are people that actual like giant adult kids.

Every day when I wake up, I think to myself how beautiful life is.

When I first wake up in the morning all I think about is how I get another day to live this amazing journey called life.

When I first wake up all I want to do is play, I want to do something fun, I don’t really want to go do work, I just want to do something fun.

That’s what life is, and so many of us miss the beauty of life every single day.

We’re so caught up with having to get somewhere, when in reality the beauty is exactly where we are.

Children wake up and they play for an hour, because they can. Adults wake up, and they need to start playing too.

Really enjoy your life. My best friend in the world, one of them, is turning seven, and he plays just like a little kid.

When he dates a woman, he has fun with her, he acts like a little boy exploring a beautiful little girl.

Every exploration is fun, present, exciting.

That’s what life is about, is about connecting with each other like we’re little children again—touching, holding, playing blocks, doing fun things.

But as an adult we get to enjoy far greater pleasures, but he have got to remember the beauty of what it’s like to be a child.

Unlock that inner child and really start exploring you life in a whole different way.

Nowadays, dating is more competitive than it’s ever been — download this free report to learn 6 proven skills to stand apart & succeed in the modern dating world.

About David

1.7 million men & women come to me every month to find the secrets to success. And after 20 years of coaching, I’ve discovered the golden keys to success in dating, business, health and wellness, and life.

I’ve helped millions of men and women around the globe achieve success in their dating, social and personal lives. I’m also a father to the world’s cutest little girl, and I am an unapologetic man. Some say I’m nuts, others say I’ve changed their life forever. One thing’s for certain: I’ll always give you the truth, whether you can handle it or not. I never sugar coat anything.

Nice is so overrated. I’d prefer brutally honest breakthrough to a “nice” rut any damn day of the week. If you’re the same way, then you've come to the right place.

26 Comments | Join the Discussion!

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Technoboy

Thursday, May 23rd, 2013

Hot button topic for me. It's good to see someone other than myself take a stand for the man-child :) Children are fun arent' they? They are so playful. Play is a bit like sleep - it LOOKS and seems completely useless, but it is in fact the exact opposite even though no one really understands why. You know what serial killers have in common? Not that they played violent games when they were kids, but that they didn't play at all! Now about responsibilities. We are in an interesting age and society. All of human history has been based on agrarian or industrial labor, where workers must endure extreme amounts of stultifyingly repetitive tasks. In such a society, the mindless discipline + grit + obedience of the adult are key work ethics, not so much the creativity, imagination, inquisitiveness, and rebellion of the child. And now to get to the point: fast forward to today. In today's age of technology, design, and marketing, having a childlike mindset is better for bread winning. The young brain is better adapted to the realities of the modern business world than the mature/old one. We are living in the age of the man-child :). So get used to it, girls.

Brad

Thursday, May 23rd, 2013

What is all this esoteric psycho babble about lately ? Are we getting high on dope ? What's next ? A trip to Tibet ? Please...no woman in the world wants a man-child. Not a single one. Yep, children can play. Adults can play, provided it pays the bills. Messing with playing blocks usually does NOT pay the bills. As sad as it may sound, it is ALL about the money. If you can make money developing games, so be it. So you wake up and you don't really want to go to work ? Don't go, and see what your boss and your co-workers, who have to do YOUR job, have to say about that. People, it is time to get solid ground under your feet again. Learn to have fun in reality, if anything, and not in some imaginary man-child world.

Technoboy

Thursday, May 23rd, 2013

"If you can make money developing games, so be it." That is a hilarious line to use on someone who used to do exactly that, Brad :) The latest company I am looking at has an official policy for never going to work tired. On the technical side, their work is some of the most solid and impressive I have ever seen. But yes it's a San Francisco based startup so I bet you anything they put in ridiculous hours. Overall though the movers and shakers working there are highly eccentric and would probably strike most people as immature + childlike misfits who need to grow up rather than as innovators with world class marketable skills. "no woman in the world wants a man-child" Well, you're right on that account. I hear that complaint a lot. For what it's worth though: it's irrational.

Al E. Neuman

Thursday, May 23rd, 2013

A lot of tech companies speak volumes of the fun workplace cultures, in part to compensate for the long hours and blurred lines between work time and private time due to constant connectivity. They do so to attract talent (fun culture is probably an industry norm to remain competitive in tech at this point) and try to keep team productivity high. This fun culture theme has spilled over into other industries. Nothing inherently wrong with companies embracing fun, so long as it's authentic! Sounds like you enjoy what you do in the first place, so go on and add more fun to it with that wacky cadre. Since San Fran is hosting the NFL Super Bowl next year, should you get in compensation talks, try negotiating Super Bowl tickets into your compensation in addition to a bevy of stock options. Good luck with the San Fran endeavor!

Technoboy

Friday, May 24th, 2013

Yes, but the fun culture is about more than just wooing you. These guys are smarter than you would think. Technology is creative in nature. And creative work is fundamentally different than other work, so creative companies need to follow entirely different rules than the hierarchical factory worker conditions most people have been conditioned to accept as 'normal'. You need sandboxes to play around in and do spontaneous things with no immediately visible benefit. You need to be able to throw stuff at the wall to find out what sticks, which includes failing frequently without people throwing you to the ground and tying your hands. You need to cross pollinate ideas with people from other departments to make them blossom or wither. You need to be in a constant state of exploration and discovery. In short, you need to be a Man Child :) Or, I could just negotiate a marginally higher salary and pay for those Super Bowl tickets myself rather than having to beg for favors :). Then again: if I want to negotiate a higher salary, what the hell am I doing looking at a startup company that makes a free product in the world's most expensive location??

john

Thursday, May 23rd, 2013

Haha.. just don't go to work, and play all day. Then, watch your car get re-posessed, get an eviction notice (or forclosure) on your door, ignore the phone while the bill collectors are calling, light candles while your electric is off, send a carrier pigeon to deliver messages because the phone company disconnected your phone.. oh, guess what.. forget finding another great job because most companies use credit reports when evaluating prospective employees. Be a man child..Sounds like a great plan! Most people don't live the Wygant life of world travelling, blog writing, and $10, 000.00 coaching sessions. Sometimes I think Dave just has no idea how most people live. My job pays great. I make great money. But, the company rules say that road drivers MUST be available SEVEN DAYS PER WEEK if needed. So, when my boss says, "go home and get some sleep, everyone's back on tonight." , I don't think he'll accept "but David Wygant told me to skip work tonight and experience life, play, and be a man child" as an excuse.

Technoboy

Thursday, May 23rd, 2013

Well, there is a big difference in what kind of mindset and lifestyle is appropriate based on what kind of job you have. For example, blue collar work is a different world entirely. I know because my brother has a REAL job. And just to stir things up some more: You mention financial irresponsibility, and I know of some very 'mature' professionals in high places who exercise a staggering amount of financial irresponsibility. You probably know some, too. And I doubt there is a woman in the world who considers financial responsibility and underspending sexy! I'm with you on the topic of finances though. You know your economic strategy of consumption over production has run its course when the average savings rate is negative! The word 'mature' SHOULD be a positive one and include balancing a checkbook. The way the term stands right now though, 'mature' has more negative meanings than positive ones to me overall. Long story.

Bobby M

Friday, May 24th, 2013

"And I doubt there is a woman in the world who considers financial responsibility and underspending sexy!" This is the goddamned problem. If I have fun, I'm a man-boy. If I'm responsible, I'm boring.

john

Thursday, May 23rd, 2013

Techno.. there's a guy on the radio here in the states named Dave Ramsey. He is a financial expert, and his show is about personal finance but with a Christian undertone. (He's very religious.) He advocates living a Debt Free lifestyle, and gives people a plan for getting debt free, then afterward, investing in mutual funds, and real estate, and saving. He points out how the majority of people get buried in car payments, credit card debt, mortgages, etc, and end up facing retirement with no savings, dependent on social security, or even digging DEEPER in debt. "If you can't afford to pay cash for it, then you can't afford it." he says. That's not what most people do. I wish I had listened to him earlier. I'm, like 99% of americans, BURIED in debt. Not that I can't pay the bills, I can, but I have to work my ass off to do it. Anyway, where I am now is in the process of getting Debt Free. I have a ways to go. I'm going to sell one of my cars, and almost have the credit cards paid off. The only debt I will have left is the Camaro payment. I have about 3 1/2 years left, but I hope to pay it off early. I could get it done sooner by selling the Camaro and buying a cheap beater with cash, but I don't want to. Selling it would cost me THOUSANDS in depreciation, plus I like it and want to keep it. But, until then, I'm working my ass off. That's why, to me, advice like "just quit your job, travel the world, experience life, just pick up and move" is a joke. Huge travel expenses (usually on a credit card), thousand dollar bootcamps, eating out all the time, are detrimental to my plans to get out of debt, and quit working to pay my creditors, and start working to pay MYSELF.

Technoboy

Friday, May 24th, 2013

Ramsey. I've seen him in the bookstore but never checked him out. Debt free is a great start. When you take a debt, you give away your freedom and independence. Unfortunately it's nowhere near feasible for buying a house or going to school and I think that's a big problem. Everything else though, including a car, I would never borrow money for. I have a basic car with 120K miles on it and I am going to drive it to the ground before getting a new one. One of the ironies of making money readily available for something (ex: more loans for students and home owners) is that it leads to increased/inflated prices in the industry into which you are pumping money. An HSA is the best instrument I ever found. It's like a retirement account - TAX FREE contributions (!!) - with the additional benefit that you can pay medical expenses with it. So if you have a large unexpected medical procedure you will save THOUSANDS all at once. An interesting thing about the math of tax free contributions: just to make the math simple let's say your tax rate is 1/3 of your income. That means you get a fifty percent (!!) bonus on your contributions: every 3 dollars in your account costs you two dollars out of pocket. There used to be other good financial instruments. The second best discovery I ever made was to keep a dangerously low balance and stash the rest in a money market fund that you can withdraw from at will. I basically had a checking account that earned 6% interest. Those days are LONG gone though. They really need to teach this stuff in school! It's so important. Lucky for me I got a world class financial education at home. I think it helps that my parents were immigrants and will never swallow the glurge of the spending + debt based economics circulating here in the US. It's SO simple actually: underconsume, then invest the rest into successful business ventures that add tangible value. That's how you create a growing economy. Duh. But who actually does that?

Dan

Thursday, May 23rd, 2013

Are we reading the same blog? Such a simple post and John and Brad come out with all the excuses. NO WHERE does it say in the post that you shouldn't work/pay bills/ be a contributing member of society. David's just talking about having fun in life. You know, waking up and greeting the day with a hearty "What up, slut?" If you're upset about this post because you think it's telling you to stop working and paying bills you definitely need to relax and have some fun. Go see Star Trek or something.

john

Friday, May 24th, 2013

I think we're reading the same blog.. I was responding to parts of this post, as well as some of the comments above. To me, the advice to be a "man-boy" just sounds like doing whatever you want, and forget about responsibilities. That's what man-boys do. I'm saying that sure, if you're filthy rich, and can afford to not work, travel the world, and spend every night partying, you can do that. But, that's not most people.

Bobby M

Friday, May 24th, 2013

I was more confused by the fact that David has done nothing but bash man-boys in the past, on this blog and the women's blog. And now this.

Brad

Thursday, May 23rd, 2013

Dan, I get your drift. My point is: that kind of stuff is very typical for guys who are at the end of their business career, usually guys in post midlife crisis halfway through their fifties, who come up with that stuff. It is nice to read and think about, but it serves no purpose because it is utterly unrealistic. That said, you better have a career and a job that you enjoy, because that means financial stability AND fun at the same time. Star Trek...not my kind of movie. I saw 'Lincoln' a while ago, that is one excellent movie. Yesterday, 'The Last Stand' with Arnie, a fun movie to watch.

Melissa

Friday, May 24th, 2013

I think of little boys and shiver. Little boys whine and cry. They hurt themselves and run to their mommy. They make huge messes. And most of all, they are constantly playing with their wee-wees. ;-p I am joking somewhat. But to be honest, I was terrified of having a boy because my brother was exactly as I described above. Now that my brother is in his 30's...he really is an amazing MAN. He's a military man and a firefighter. He treats his wife with the utmost respect. He is able to build/create anything. He gives to society. There is nothing about him that is similar to the horrible, whiny mama's boy he was. Why? He grew up! Honestly, I thank the military. Do I really think some 'man' from a start-up software firm who smokes pot and plays corn-hole at the office will fix my sink when he gets home? Will that 'man' trim his mustache and put on a fresh ironic Elmo t-shirt when he takes me out to dinner at the raw food juice bar so we can power up and play frisbee golf? Nah. Not a fan of the man-child. I think responsibility is sexy....what's sexy about it? Having a handle on your life. Knowing when to play and when to be serious. No feelings of entitlement. That kind of thing. How do men feel about a woman-child? Not a term you hear all that often....

Technoboy

Friday, May 24th, 2013

Hehe. Actually, If I we were dating, frisbee golf + cornhole most likely WOULD be on the agenda at some point. Damn, am I that predictable?! Not so much the pot smoking part though, but that's just because I am adamant about my health, especially lungs. I don't even know what a woman child would be. My mental image is Phoebe from Friends? In which case I would say yes please. Besides brainy ballsy business chick, the other type that gets my interest tends to be the eccentric creative free spirit.

Melissa

Friday, May 24th, 2013

I don't mind playing games...but that can't be the only thing. Games are fun distractions and activities. To me, a 'man-child' is just that...another child. I don't think you hear of 'women-children' all that much because we grow up. Having children of our own forces us to be responsible...in ALL ways. Pay the bills, clean the house, make the money for the bills, take care of the babies, feed, clothe....etc etc. In the article David says the first thing he wants to do in the morning is play. Not me. First thing I think about is what I want to accomplish. What I 'need' to accomplish, unfortunately, before I can even indulge in playful thoughts. Most women I know are like this. Nowadays, we have almost the entire household burden along with the kids and the making of the money...'play' is relegated to a few random girl's night's outs. Interesting, the differences.

Technoboy

Friday, May 24th, 2013

"To me, a ‘man-child’ is just that…another child" Except he's more like a grandchild - all the playfulness + benefits of having a kid, minus the dependence + responsibility. He won't need you to pay for anything, to drive him to soccer games and recitals, to help him with his homework, ... Plus let's not forget a man-child makes for a more fun playmate than a real child :). Let's stop pretenting like that only matters to men. But yes, interesting how the man-child phenomenon is well known but there is no clear notion of a woman-child. Something I learned a long time ago: 'mature' is an impossibly vague term. It means many different things to different people. By conventional social definitions I am seen as very immature. But if you limit your definition to being independent, having control over yourself, and having thick skin, for example, all of a sudden I am the exact opposite. Funny how that works out.

Bobby M

Friday, May 24th, 2013

Melissa, listen to the song "22" by Taylor Swift. That's what a woman-child is. And I loathe them.

Bob

Saturday, May 25th, 2013

I set a plan in motion while still in high school. Work 16 hour days, 7 days a week, invest in real estate, open several businesses, all while continuing to work at a mundane job that I hated (paid very well though, so was a temporary (14 years) means to an end). Save every penny, and sacrifice my youthful experiences, so I could retire in my mid 30's, and enjoy what I consider the best time in a man's life (30 to 60). I was successful in my goal, and now live the lifestyle I worked so hard to accomplish. But, due to the nature of having to work so hard to get here, I still have the strong work ethics, drive, and ambitions that I had to aquire to get to this point, so I could never just be a "man child" even if I wanted to. I still live responsibly and very conservatively, but have learned to just do what I feel, when I feel like it, and take advantage of my hard earned accomplishments.

Brad

Saturday, May 25th, 2013

I think Techno has a good point. A lot of jobs these days require some sort of out of he box thinking, which can be called playfulness. In order to accomplish anything these days, you need an almost psychotic intensity. I cannot work with people that don't give it a 150% each and every day. The laughs come naturally.

Technoboy

Wednesday, May 29th, 2013

" A lot of jobs these days require some sort of out of he box thinking, which can be called playfulness" Just checked out another company. Their main sales pitch is they pride themselves on how nerdy + eccentric their employees are, and how misfit-friendly their environment is. They have a few hundred employees and some 'best place to work at' awards, so it looks like their strategy is working :) It's a brave new world out there, folks. The Man Children are taking over. If you think I'm bad, just wait until you see the kids just coming out of school! Brace yourselves. And for the record: I'm all for it. Because in terms of actual skills, knowledge, passion, and integrity, I would much, MUCH rather work with these kids than with 'mature' managerial types. You might scoff at their style, but their substance is rock solid. And just to stir the pot some more: “At the same time came the disciples unto Jesus, saying, Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven? / And Jesus called a little child unto him, and set him in the midst of them, / And said, Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.”

Dan

Saturday, May 25th, 2013

Listen, man boys are the scourge of modern life. They don't have their shit together and they're a drain. You'll get no argument from me. This blog post isn't about that. It's about keeping the spirit of a boy so that you never lose a sense of fun. Take a girl for a picnic, spontaneously put on some music and dance with her, take her to laser tag. And be able to pay for it. If David had said "never lose your child-like joy". I think it's just symantecs right now.

Isa

Saturday, October 11th, 2014

Beautiful words, love them.

We Are Just Giant Man-Boys

About David

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26 Comments | Join the Discussion!

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Technoboy

Brad

Technoboy

Al E. Neuman

Technoboy

john

Technoboy

Bobby M

john

Technoboy

Dan

john

Bobby M

Brad

Melissa

Technoboy

Melissa

Technoboy

Bobby M

Bob

Brad

Technoboy

Dan

Isa