I think I’m smelling a theme here. Saturday we were full of bullshit, yesterday we had an ‘ass on,’ and today I’m off to get my physical (and I think we’re all well aware of what will happen there!)

The Discovery Channel has Shark Week. Is this going to be “Ass Week” here? Is the week before Memorial Day going to annually be “Ass Week?” If you really think about it, it already is.

Women are in the gym working on their ass and trying to get it ready for bikini season. Men are in the gym checking out all the women’s asses. Women are also going to be going out shopping for an outfit for all the Memorial Day barbecues going on, and they will all be asking their friends “Does my ass look fat in this?”

So now I think that from this year forward, the week before Memorial Day will be “Ass Week” on the blog. In keeping with this new tradition, tomorrow I will have a podcast all about how not to be an ass when you’re out meeting women.

Also, if you want a nice preview of “Ass Week,” check out this great ass-related blog from times past:

With June Around the corner and I am sure some of you have to endure a wedding or two, lets talk about the ultimate wedding gift to every couple I know getting married. You’ll never guess what it is.

I go to a sex toy shop and put together what I call “The Lover’s Package.” I get them the best G-spot stimulator/vibrator, the best clitoral ring, outfits to wear, handcuffs, silk handkerchiefs to tie each other up…

You and I both know that after a long time with someone, sex may need some creativity.

Not only that, but this is the only wedding present that they’re ever going to remember!

I give this gift to every single person that is getting married. I’ll spend $100 or $150 and get them some stuff that they will actually use!