You’ve met a man.

You met him on an app.

You met him on an online dating site.

You met him out and about.

You have a connection, or at least you feel like you have a connection.

You exchange a few text messages back and forth.

You set some time to meet, or to talk on the phone.

Then all of a sudden, he ghosts. He becomes like Casper the ghost, but not Casper the friendly ghost. Casper the unfriendly ghost.

Why do so many potential love connections in today’s modern world of dating become ghosts?

It happens all the time.

Conceptual keyboard - Find Love (pink key)

Sometimes it happens after a few dates, even after you’ve been intimate and had sex. People disappear and think it’s okay.

It happens to me on a regular basis as well. I’ll have a connection with a woman, then all of a sudden she vanishes into thin air.

A lot of the times I’ll send them a text and say, I hope you weren’t abducted by aliens. I’m getting really concerned 🙂

Why does this happen? Well, I’m going to explain a couple of reasons why people ghost.

Today’s world has us doing things 24/7. We’re constantly aware of our schedule. We’re aware of what we can do socially and simultaneously, so people will ghost because they’ve got too much going on.

It used to be really simple. Boy meets girl. Girls meets boy. You connect.

You go out, and you don’t have a whole lot of other options. You used to go out on a date and talk to your friends about it the next day. But now, you go out on a date then you go home and check your dating apps and online sites for more new matches. A bigger, better, hotter match! There’s always one that’s potentially better.

There are so many options. So you can have what you think is a connection with somebody and then they go home and somebody else might be a tad bit prettier, or an inch taller, or slightly more intriguing in some other way. And so they ghost on you.

Another reason that people ghost is that so many individuals are broken nowadays. They’ve overanalyzed their dating life. They’ve read so many articles. They’ve done so much research, and they overanalyze every little thing.

So you can have this great connection that’s starting to form, but they are so afraid of blowing it, of doing it wrong. And the older you get, the more you’re ghosted. Because people just stay closed off in their shit and don’t take the time to get to know somebody new.

People like to stay in their comfort zone. They like to stay in their fear. They like to stay where they are.

That’s why people ghost. You can’t take it personally. Everybody gets ghosted.

People like to hide. People like to hide with their friends. People like to hide being busy with work and life. They like to hide in their phones.

We’ve become a culture that’s over-scheduled and over stimulated.

It used to be that if you could get in touch with a friend and you would go out. If not you would just stay home. Now you’re constantly able to text and talk, and text and talk and over-schedule your entire life.

Next time somebody ghosts you, send him this text:

I didn’t know your name was Casper. At first you were a friendly ghost, now you’ve vanished. Lets re-connect Casper 🙂 

Try that. Try calling people out on their ghosting shit.