The Dangers of Being A Storyteller
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Let’s face reality today. We’re all storytellers based on our past or based on our dreams and desires. The other night, I went out with a friend, and we were talking. We talked about stories, and it was interesting, because we were both able to look at each other and admit we’re sometimes stuck in a story so powerful that we actually miss a moment that arises. Let me explain.
Take a look at some of the comments you guys place on my blog. A lot of them are stories. They are stories about the reasons why you can’t meet somebody or can’t have a good relationship. We tell ourselves these stories many different times. For instance…
A story I can tell myself over and over again. I see a mom, a dad, and a child. I create a whole story about them. Look, there’s a family. Look, they’re together. Look, they’re happy it’s the three of them. And then my brain just goes off into what happened in my past relationships.
It maneuvers all of the place and starts creating scenarios and stories and events. I go back to the couple and I’ve created a whole story about their relationship. This will go on. Sometimes for hours. Think about when you start creating a story. I know when I create the story, I spend hours feeling it. It’s painful. Think about when you go out on a Friday night. You see a woman standing there. She’s beautiful. You create a story about her. You create a reason why you can’t go over, what happened to you in the past, the rejection that’s impending.
You create a story about her. A guy comes over and talks to her, and you create a story about him and their impending relationship and how smooth he is and everything else. We do this all day long. We create stories that stop us from living our lives. Let’s take this another step further. You’re in a place of people, social people, because usually it takes people to trigger the most painful story. So, now when you have that story running through your mind, this is what usually happens. You shut down and you’re not able to meet somebody.
The universe put you in that location at the same time to meet people. There might be a woman standing there who’s out that night, who is not in story at all. She attempts to make contact. But you miss out on the contact because you are stuck in a story. Once the story starts looping, there’s no way to get out of it unless you make that choice. Unless you are able tell yourself that it’s just a story.
The girl looking at you doesn’t understand why you’re not willing to connect or be present. And they move on to meet somebody else. We do this all the time. We allow stories to control our lives. You may not ask your boss for a raise. You may not go on a vacation. It occurs in all parts of our lives. We have trigger points that set off a story, and that story triggers a mood. And nothing gets accomplished.
The Real Reason You Can’t Meet Women?
We miss out on the present moment. We miss out on life. We miss out on so many things that are being presented to us because we allow our stories to loop. We’ve perfected them. They’re almost like full-blown feature films at this point. The stories are the past. When you bring up a story, you’re stuck in the past. You’re stuck in something that failed in the past. You’re stuck in an emotion in the past, and you’re not being present. You tell yourself it’s te reason you can’t get a girlfriend.
When you’re not present, you can’t create the moment in front of you. You need to recognize it’s just a story. You don’t know the person. You’re creating a story based on a trigger point. So, at that point, stop, walk out of a room, take a deep breath, take a few deep breaths and tell that overactive mind of yours that you’re creating a negative story. You’re creating something that doesn’t serve you any more. Take another deep breath.
You don’t know this person at all, but they triggered something from your past, something that is still hanging over you. Then, tell yourself that you’re living in the present moment so you no longer have to listen to your stories. You’ll become more present, more aware and your soul will start to calm down. And your mind will start to connect to your heart.
Nowadays, dating is more competitive than it’s ever been — download this free report to learn 6 proven skills to stand apart & succeed in the modern dating world.
6 Comments | Join the Discussion!
Hans
Friday, November 7th, 2014
Random Awesome Guy
Friday, November 7th, 2014
Yureon
Sunday, November 9th, 2014
raymond
Sunday, November 9th, 2014
John
Sunday, November 9th, 2014
Cheryl Christine
Wednesday, August 26th, 2015