The #1 Mistake Men Make When Approaching A Group Of Women

Men's Advice Uncategorized, Videos

By David Wygant March 10, 2012 187 Shares

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Approaching a group of women is always a big obstacle for my beginner clients.

You don’t want all of them–just the really hot one right?

Sure, but if you don’t know how to engage the group as a whole, you’re dead in the water.

Watch this undercover video as I breakdown an approach:

Pretty simple right?

What are some great ways that you’ve engaged the friend of someone you really liked?

Have you ever been the friend?

Let me know in the comments below.

About David

1.7 million men & women come to me every month to find the secrets to success. And after 20 years of coaching, I’ve discovered the golden keys to success in dating, business, health and wellness, and life.

I’ve helped millions of men and women around the globe achieve success in their dating, social and personal lives. I’m also a father to the world’s cutest little girl, and I am an unapologetic man. Some say I’m nuts, others say I’ve changed their life forever. One thing’s for certain: I’ll always give you the truth, whether you can handle it or not. I never sugar coat anything.

Nice is so overrated. I’d prefer brutally honest breakthrough to a “nice” rut any damn day of the week. If you’re the same way, then you've come to the right place.

24 Comments | Join the Discussion!

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Desiree

Saturday, March 10th, 2012

David, You are RIGHT on the money with this! As usual. By the way, I am SO glad to hear of your first Boot Camp For Women! Sadly, I will not be able to attend this one, but I will start saving up to attend one in the future. I'm still technically a student (I'm interning now), graduating officially in April and moving to PA in less than two months, and will be transitioning into my new career. So there is no money for it right now. I wish I could make it happen somehow, though! I know that I could definitely benefit from a women's boot camp run by you, and I'd love to pick your brain about men and shake your hand someday! I hope to maybe attend one in Spring of 2013. That'll give me a year to save up and plan. Thanks again, for all that you give, and all that you do. For being passionate about helping us make ourselves better, getting down to the nitty gritty of facing ourselves, and preparing ourselves to receive love. Dez

john

Saturday, March 10th, 2012

I am ALWAYS the friend. (when I had single friends to go out with.) I would talk to a girl for a while, thinking I was making progress,, (this is one specific example of what happened one time) , then she pulled me close to her, and whispered so softly in my ear, " hey,, is your FRIEND single? He's really cute." That's how it always went. Never me. Everyone else. Some things never change.

Mike

Saturday, March 10th, 2012

One should engage both of them rather one or the other. I have a story to share, this happened last Friday at one of the premiere clubs in Florida. Two guys who were buddies, approached two beautiful women at the bar. They asked if they could buy them drinks and the girls accepted. When the band started to play which was quite awhile after the guys approached them, the two girls excused themselves and said they would be right back. Can you guess what happened next? The guys waited and they waited perhaps over an hour for the girls to come back while never venturing inside where the band was playing. In the meantime, the girls were having a great time dancing with other guys...lol So what is the lesson here even with a group of women, you can't buy stuff in order for them to like you. Instead of approaching those beautiful women and offering to buy drinks right away, they should have connected with them. I'll give them some credit though, they did approach, many guys do not even do that.

Adam

Sunday, March 11th, 2012

@Mike - They approached, only to do what's in their comfort zone. People are creatures of habit. We do what we know, EVEN WHEN WE KNOW IT DOESN'T WORK. “First we make our habits, then our habits make us.” - Charles C. Noble

Amanda

Sunday, March 11th, 2012

David that is soooo true!! I've been the friend and the girl in the group the guy wants. A guy approached my friends while we were in a club at a table. He was friendly and after a minute asked if he could sit and join us. He asked every girl in the group their names and shook all of their hands. I was the last girl he shook hands with, but I was actually the girl he came over to meet! I was impressed how polite he was and how he engaged all of my friends. Very well done! Another time I was at a club with one friend. In the middle of our conversation, some random guy cuts right in front of me and starts talking to my friend and hitting on her. He acted as if I wasn't even there! I was like "who does this guy think he is?" I was extremely mad. My friend was shocked he was so rude. We talked all kinds of garbgage about him and never been so turned off by someone before. She wasn't interested. He actually came back later and tried hiiting on me since she didn't respond!! I wasn't going to give this jerk any of my time at all. Word to the wise: manners go far with women.

KC

Sunday, March 11th, 2012

David great advice.I know I've messed this up the time I tried it.I was thinking this was a demonstration video from the way it was titled.

Kevin

Sunday, March 11th, 2012

They aren't into him.

Konstantin

Sunday, March 11th, 2012

I want to ask you a question because I was talking about that with my friend Do any of you got slapped after first kiss on first date? I ask you cause I haven't experienced that and I think that only happens in movies.

John

Sunday, March 11th, 2012

Ummm, what movie was that?? I don't think I have ever seen that even happen in a movie,, where a date ends, they have a first kiss,, and the girl hauled off and slapped the dude. Are you seriously waiting for that to happen?

Al E. Neuman

Sunday, March 11th, 2012

Could any of you wise ladies and gentleman recommend on how to approach the group of girls in the club that are dancing in a circle? Haha, yes the diagnosis is approach anxiety. The group of girls give me the impression they just want to dance on their own. Yet I think they really want a guy to sweep them off their feet. I don't want to be like lecherous guys that just try to go up behind the girl and grind with her. So how do you gentleman approach and how would you ladies like to be approached and how to keep the conversation flowing? Please go behind a blanket response of "just be yourself" or "say hello"? Dez, congrats on your coming graduation and move to PA to start a career. Kon, never heard of anyone get slapped for giving a girl a kiss on first date. She may give you a slap if you're into that kind of thing and ask her, lol

Konstantin

Sunday, March 11th, 2012

Haha naw man.Just we were discussing with friend about that,and just to ask if happend to anyone.Just curious :))

Collin

Sunday, March 11th, 2012

@Konstantin, the only time I have ever been slapped was following a joke that strongly implied that a girl at the bar had engaged in intercourse with more men than she could remember. Just don't do that, and I'm sure you'll be fine.

Collin

Sunday, March 11th, 2012

Also, this weekend, I was visiting friends, and there was one girl there who I hadn't seen in over a year. Apparently, she told most of the group that she doesn't know what it is, but I've gotten more attractive since the last time she saw me. I haven't gotten any taller or more muscular, I haven't exactly gotten richer, and I highly doubt she notices the difference in my old and new motorcycles. The only thing that has changed significantly is all that intangible personality/confidence stuff. I don't know if there's any more necessary proof that "inner game" is the most important piece of the equation.

Intern Dan

Monday, March 12th, 2012

Collin, you offer yet more proof that looks, money, job, or motorcycle make little difference when your inner game is in tip-top shape.

bob

Monday, March 12th, 2012

Collin, Maybe it's the new Men's Warehouse suit you been sportin'? Just a thought.

bob

Monday, March 12th, 2012

I've been busy with a passel of 'em since listening to David's Mastery series. I will admit, I have lowered my standards a bit though, just to get more practice in with various types of women and age groups. Three different women this Weekend alone. (my weekend starts on ladies night, Thursday's now) Hope all you blog junkies have been having success in your pursuits.

Intern Dan

Monday, March 12th, 2012

Desiree, congratulations on your graduation! What were you taking? I took my first bootcamp when I was a student. It was expensive but I knew I was investing in myself and trusted that this was the direction my life needed to take. The money miraculously appeared for the bootcamp. If you really want to do it, and I can tell you do, the money will appear for it. :) Al E. Neuman, I was at a club one time and there was a group of women in a bachelorette party dressed as devils doing the whole dancing in a circle thing. I observed what they were doing and confidently went up to them and asked "so, what can a guy get if he sells you his soul?" They laughed and before you knew it they were all dancing around me and we had a wonderfully fun night. The point is, approaching a group of girls dancing in a circle isn't really different from approaching them alone. Be confident, observe what they're doing and go in with a fun spirit. Usually I see that they're dancing so I'll go in and start dancing with them, or challenge them to a dance-off. I always approach it from the standpoint of finding out if they want to "play." Like when you were a kid at the park and you were fearless about asking the other kids if they wanted to play tag. "Do you want to play?" And if they don't, there's always someone else that does.

Al E. Neuman

Monday, March 12th, 2012

Superb advice Intern Dan, thank you!

Tim

Monday, March 12th, 2012

John, Why do you still post here? It is so fucking old hearing you whine and complain. No wonder you have been dateless for the past 13 years. I hate to get mad but get the fuck over it. If you are still on this website bitching about your life, then you are absolutely right. Your life will never change. Best of luck to you dude.

Tim

Monday, March 12th, 2012

On topic, this is a great thing to do. I remember I was talking to a woman in school this last week, and I wasn't all that attracted to her. But I could tell she was attracted to me. And well we were talking and having some fun, and she sees one of her friends, and tells me to go over there and call her some funny name. So I did, and her friend was stunning, and a lot of fun to talk to. Because she saw me talking to her friend, she instantly was very open with me. And we ended up exchanging numbers, and are going on a date tonight!! Man it feels fucking great when this stuff starts to click. :) :) Wish me luck guys. I hope all of you are having as great of day as me right now.

john

Monday, March 12th, 2012

@Tim,, I'll post where I want, and I don't care what you think about it.

Desiree

Monday, March 12th, 2012

Dear Intern Dan, Why thank you, sugar! I'm about to graduate as a Medical Assistant, then I plan on completing my Bachelors in Nursing in Philly. I believe that there is an Abundance of what we need that is always present, and that we have to just be open enough and know how to attract it. I believe that what you say about the money presenting itself as being completely plausible and possible to occur for me as well. April isn't that far away, but miracles happen every day! So we shall see. Is this maiden Bootcamp for us maidens being held in LA? I'm curious. Oh, and by the way, is it possible for you to get any more handsome? Judging by your latest icon picture, I guess it is! I love black and white photography as well; it's lovely. Your lady is a lucky one. @Al I agree with Dan on the advice about approaching a group of women. I think that if I was dancing with a group of ladies, and a nice guy came up to us to dance, he could just jump in the middle and do his thing! And if he was a great dancer, and/or funny with it, all the better! After the music stops, he could engage them all for a review of his skills, and join in a conversation with them. Then, from there he could feel out the group and see who he 'vibes' best with. Hone in on her! The rest is elementary. Tim, Good luck with your date, sweetheart! It's nice to see someone getting out there and doing the damn thing! And your positive energy is infectious! All the best. Collin, You look great in your suit pic! I think a certain blogger here (who knows who he is) was hating on you and Shogo's clothing! You both look hot! If Shogo's grey tee that he wore in his Q and A blog makes him look like an inmate, then I will meet his ass at the Conjugal Visit Trailer anytime!! And yes, confidence and self love go a LONG way to how you are perceived, and to your attractiveness factor going through the roof! Work it, baby! Good luck to you as well. John, I sometimes wonder if you are desiring the attention and sympathy you get here for being alone, instead of changing your fate. You are perpetually creating a self-fulfilling prophecy! Low self esteem about your looks (which is crazy - you're a good looking guy!), your height (some of us women are NOT hung up on that shit; I prefer shorter guys, as I'm 5'2!), your job (you have a good job that pays well; you travel a lot but that's a good thing and NOT an excuse in meeting someone), on and on. You don't love yourself, and we women can sense it when a man doesn't feel confident. Ultimately, on a primal level, we want to feel safe and protected with our man. So if you don't feel safe in yourself, how in the hell are you going to expect a woman to 'feel' you? Or feel comfortable with you? Then, that in turn repels the women out there who ARE single and looking. And thus, you're back to Square One. I am a big believer in changing your life, being proactive or accepting it. So stop bitching, start your own personal revolution!! Or accept your fate and be single for the rest of your life. Your call. For myself, I feel that I'm getting closer to leaving the 'clothing' of the past and the old ways behind. To lay down the pain. Time to strip down and get Naked!! If I'm meant to go to this first bootcamp, the resources will show up in time. "It's a new dawn, it's a new day.." Dez

José Colín

Tuesday, March 13th, 2012

Number 1 John hater here, and I gotta tell you something very important John! pay attention.... :)

Tsali

Tuesday, March 13th, 2012

Tim, just ignore John. He posts on purpose to troll. I don't even think he has those problems in real life anymore.

The #1 Mistake Men Make When Approaching A Group Of Women

About David

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24 Comments | Join the Discussion!

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Desiree

john

Mike

Adam

Amanda

KC

Kevin

Konstantin

John

Al E. Neuman

Konstantin

Collin

Collin

Intern Dan

bob

bob

Intern Dan

Al E. Neuman

Tim

Tim

john

Desiree

José Colín

Tsali