Texting Tips For Men (And What You Shouldn’t Do!)

Men's Advice Uncategorized, Videos

By David Wygant October 11, 2013 249 Shares

Nowadays, dating is more competitive than it’s ever been — download this free report to learn 6 proven skills to stand apart & succeed in the modern dating world.

It’s Friday. There’s a good chance some of you will go out this weekend and get a phone number (or two!)

So you got the number. How do you text women? When should you text her? What should you say? What should you do if she doesn’t return your messages?

That last question really drives some of you guys nuts doesn’t it?

You’ve been texting a girl back and forth, then all of a sudden she doesn’t text back and you start going crazy wondering what’s gone wrong. You look through every single message you ever sent her, looking for something you might have said to put her off. You need to stop worrying. And you definitely need to stop sending desperate texts asking why she hasn’t got back to you!

Trust me, it doesn’t make you look attractive!

Take a look at the video below from YouTube and I’ll give you some more texting pointers.

Nowadays, dating is more competitive than it’s ever been — download this free report to learn 6 proven skills to stand apart & succeed in the modern dating world.

About David

1.7 million men & women come to me every month to find the secrets to success. And after 20 years of coaching, I’ve discovered the golden keys to success in dating, business, health and wellness, and life.

I’ve helped millions of men and women around the globe achieve success in their dating, social and personal lives. I’m also a father to the world’s cutest little girl, and I am an unapologetic man. Some say I’m nuts, others say I’ve changed their life forever. One thing’s for certain: I’ll always give you the truth, whether you can handle it or not. I never sugar coat anything.

Nice is so overrated. I’d prefer brutally honest breakthrough to a “nice” rut any damn day of the week. If you’re the same way, then you've come to the right place.

23 Comments | Join the Discussion!

Cancel reply

Adam

Friday, October 11th, 2013

David- Your blogs have helped me over the years become a better communicator and put fear aside in meeting new woman. Recently I saw a friend of a friends on Facebook who was very attractive and I sent her a whity message. She responded that I made her day, inquired more about me and how I knew our mutual friend, but that she was seeing someone new currently. How do I respond to a message like that? She obviously is off the market but knows I'm interested. Do you play the nice guy routine and wish her the best or how would you respond. Thanks in advance!

Tony

Friday, October 11th, 2013

David. Thank you for posting this at the right time. Had a girl recently view and write me on my profile. We wrote eachother than u asked for her number. She did and we texted a good bunch today. It's been 4 hours since she replied to my last text and I started that I don't know what to think feeling. After watching this, I know what to do and how to keep it together.

not telling! na na!

Saturday, October 12th, 2013

calling your readers/listeners morons is probably not the best way to engender loyal followers lol

KL Chang

Saturday, October 12th, 2013

Thank you David once again. I'd like to share my experience on texting too. I simply lay down my thoughts and actions here, and I welcome everybody to comment and make suggestions on them. (Again, this is from Hong Kong) So I met a girl who was 8 years younger than I am. She wasn't beautiful but I found her attractive. We knew each other in a French class. She's a recent university graduate. What happened was I talked to her in and out the class and we developed some nice bonding. Soon she found her job and I lunched with her after two weeks. We updated each other. More than a month later she proposed a dinner. But because of many other errands an exact date was never set until 3 more weeks after that. I suggested a chat by the harbour instead of being confined in a restaurant. She was excited. There we had a good conversation in the wind. I had a bottle of red wine, and some snacks for her. She asked me whether my then girlfriend would be unhappy, whether I would still do the same after a girl accepted me, whether I was going to marry my girl. I told her I wouldn't. (Actually I was on the verge of breaking up and did it later.) We had a wonderful night, I gave her money for taxi-ing her straight back home. After that night, I tried to text her and she would merely give me some casual response and gestured a refusal to carry on with conversations. Then another 2 weeks passed and I proposed a meet-up. She said she would check her schedule as I asked her to but there was no response. When the French class resumed, I saw her in the corridor and we made a few exchanges. Then I said "You did not respond to me" and she immediately paid me a smile and waved goodbye. I thought she was like treating me like a tissue paper. 3 days later I texted her and said unlike the first 2 occasions this time she left my invitation open and unanswered, and I asked "anything happened?" She gave me only an angry face without a single word. Then I replied "I am confused. I don't like to be treated like this with no good reason." That's all. My thought was like that. I prepared so many good things and gave her a wonderful night which she did enjoy. (She literally kept sight on the walking-on-the-road me until the taxi went too far away. She texted me immediately and thanked me that night.) And all of a sudden she changed her attitude, faked me and cringed and tried to make off right away when I challenged about her ignorance. And at last she merely paid me an emoticon without anything. I want my friends to be reciprocal and responsive. So why on earth should I keep playing the game and let her believe that she could treat me like her napkin? It's better to say my feeling out simply and directly, and make a closure. That's my story and my thought. I'm not sure if I had got David's idea wrongly but I believe that when you see that a girl treats you a jerk in her text, face it and tell her that you don't like it and never try to think too much on "How can I steer it away?" Because how she behaves reveals what kind of person she is in truth. Rather than acting like her jerk, I prefer slamming it before I leave with my head held high. Lastly, I welcome comments and observations. See how you guys view the matter. :)

Bren

Tuesday, October 22nd, 2013

When she didn't return your texts after the harbour chat, you should have left her alone. Clearly she was no longer interested. It might have been the issue with your girlfriend or it might have been something completely different. Everytime you contacted her after that you just convinced her that you are damaged goods. Girls like a little persistence but not stalkers. You = Stalker. It is probably too late now but in the future, when you happen to run into her, just be friendly and act as if nothing happened. She might be curious enough to re-initiate.

KL Chang

Wednesday, October 23rd, 2013

Wow, it's glad to see a reply. I didn't expect it. Thank you Bren. Right. This experience teaches a good lesson. I really don't know where the line dividing persistence and stalking is; it is especially so when I was to make a decision in the picture. (Still I am not very clear about that.) But anyway I take this life lecture and your advice. It's really better to run away. David's teachings always need to be act on in order to internalise. And that teaches me another lesson: act on what I was taught and wait and see. Thanks again Bren :D

M

Saturday, October 12th, 2013

Hey David, I hung out with a girl from work tonight along with a couple of other work friends. It's the first time i've really had a chance to talk and get to know her a little bit. I felt like she may have been attracted but I really had a hard time feeling it out.. I would never consider dating someone from work but I feel obsessed already. I know that it's not healthy to get like that. Maybe I just need to give it some time to pass.

Cam

Saturday, October 12th, 2013

Hey David, I made a rule for myself. I never under any circumstances text before receiving a reply from the previous message. The last time I was guilty of the double or triple text was about 5 months ago. I was seeing a girl I really liked. We had great chemistry in person and everything was going well. And in a span of about 2 weeks I blew the whole thing by texting before she got back to me. Since then its been working great, I just text it and forget it. Since i have this rule to follow I never get stressed out, because once I send the text its out of my hands. There`s no doubt as to what I should do next. If she doenst get back to me I might send another one a few days later, or move on.

Addo

Saturday, October 12th, 2013

Hey David, I'm 18 years old. I barley have any friends but I'm trying to make some. But the problem is my friends will only hang with me when I'm their days off kinda guy. For instance each one will have these awesome times and adventures and what not with their friends but when it comes to me I'm just the hang out at the mall guy or the I'll see if I have time guy. The few think I have a great personality and we get along good. Girls think I'm good looking and guys say I should be pulling heaps but when I ask them to hangout sometime they either decline, say they will and don't or if we do it'll just be after they finish work or something or they're about to hang with their friends at some cool place so I'm the temporary. Never get dressed and be excited to go on a fun date somewhere should it be watch a soccer game or an outing somwhere. And yes I do take opportunities when I'm with their friends to try make new friends or meet new people when out with them but I'm still that guy. Why am I so under appreciated david? Been lonely for a while, a video response would be appreciated! Thanks mentor david.

Bobby

Monday, October 14th, 2013

Being 18 can definitely suck. I'd first ask myself if I truly enjoy these "friends" you have. Don't think in terms of what they are thinking. If you like them as people then ask them more personal questions every once and a while... "go deeper" as David says. you may find they aren't that great other than for hanging out doing stupid shit every once and a while. The reality is though that 18 year olds are pretty much twats. You aren't even going to know these people after high school or after first year college.. just enjoy yourself and make the best of it. Friends change-these guys may not even talk to each other 1 year down the line either. Just find good people is my advice- a hobby, whatever.

Hans

Saturday, October 12th, 2013

Great blog ! Get real, people. If she wants to text you, go out with you, date you, she will make it happen. Don't ever become a stalker. Each and every woman has stories of guys that creep her out, don't become another horror story. She doesn't find you attractive, be totally okay with that. It really is the coolest thing you can do.

Mike

Saturday, October 12th, 2013

Na na, the video comes from David's YouTube. Think he's referring to the randoms over there that leav stupid comments.

john

Sunday, October 13th, 2013

I agree with David 100%. You people are serioulsy MORONS. :-)

Bobby

Monday, October 14th, 2013

I've traded a billion texts before with this one girl/woman not too long ago. It just taught me I hate texting. It also annoyed me when i'd get texts all day and If I didn't respond right away she'd be like "WHERE ARE YOU??" Finally I kind of blew up at her (I was under a lot of stress this one week) and said "look, im sick of the texting, its childish, just meet up with me or don't" or something along those lines. She pulled back completely. I apologized but I actually don't even regret it (my intuition said we were incompatible despite getting along pretty well). She actually tried to contact me a few months ago after like a year of silence lol. Gorgeous girl and nice person but didn't have a great personality-something was off.... too many "haha's" piss me off. Too bland of a vibe and no courage. TBH she strikes me as the type of girl that will settle down with some jocky dude with no personality who will settle down with her to boost his ego. Or maybe I'm more bitter than I realize =). I appreciate her though-this one "failure" taught me a shitload about women. Having a stunning woman blowing up your phone definitely makes you feel good at times-showed me the power of ballsyness. I just really hate texts... it's so impersonal.

Ray

Tuesday, October 15th, 2013

Hey David, I'm 20 years old so social media is pretty important in my age group. Most of my friends use Instagram to share photos, especially girls, they usually take "selfies" of their makeup, hair, or outfit. These posts are usually followed with a dozen comments from guys saying "you're perfect" "I like your hair" "why are u so beautiful?" etc... What can I do to sound different and be noticed? I don't want to be 1 of 10 guys leaving the same comment. I guess I could tell her personally, not really sure. What do you think??

Janet

Thursday, October 17th, 2013

Hi David. Obviously I'm not a guy, but I watched your video anyway because I was curious to hear what you had to say. Honestly, I was not pissed or offended by a single thing you said. You are spot on. I say this because there are some really stupid men out there who think they know how to text or talk to a woman. Jeez the rubbish I have rad and heard would curl your toes and make you hang your head in shame to be that these people from the same sex as you! The things they suggest borders on abuse and suggests mild pornographic advice. It's really shocking what some guys out there are trying to pawn off as good advice on how to attract women. Personally, I like your style and frank advice. You are all about facts and no B.S. It's nice to know there are men out there teaching other men and boys how to be men.

Bob

Friday, October 18th, 2013

Real Men don't need to write stinkin' texts in the first place! Texting is for girlie men and girls. Grow some balls.

Hans

Friday, October 18th, 2013

I fully agree with Bob ! This whole texting business is utter crap. I never texted a woman in my entire life. You like a woman, go talk to her, in person.

sean

Tuesday, October 22nd, 2013

Man... Have I done this. Just gone absolutely nuts over a girl texting me back!! I've been seeing this girl on and off for the last eight months. We were together and for the first couple months and she was so into me. I decided to leave because it seemed like we were always fighting! Then I went back and left again...and then I did it one more time. And you know what she took me back again and has absolutely no trust in me. I've learned a lot about myself in these last eight months of seeing her and I realize now that I do love her and want to be with her, but it's like the boy who cried wolf. And she doesn't believe me. She expects me to leave I expect to get hurt. And when she doesn't text me back (she lives 2 hours away in another city) I assume that she is ignoring me...or she is with some other guy that she's been hiding in her closet...or she just doesn't care about me even though we talk every day. My mind seriously makes me crazy. I can believe made up situations and they can affect my mood (for example her with someone else). I've really trying to work on myself and to validate myself and be happy with myself, without her. I find that it's easy for me to be single. I am happy and my best self when I am single and I think that the only way to work on some of the issues i have is to work on them in a relationship. So I am trying and it's hard, but I'm keeping the faith. It's hard really hard some days being in my situation but I don't want to leave her. Godspeed

Addo

Friday, November 1st, 2013

Thank you bobby

Cynthia

Friday, June 20th, 2014

Guy: sends me picture of a quote that says: over thinking ruins friendships and relationships. Over thinking causes problems you never had. Don't over think, just over flow with good vibes. Then he writes: you have created some problems Me: Well come talk to me about it then. Too much gets lost in translation via text. Guy: you felt it. Me: now I'm feeling all nervous and anxious about problems I've created. I'd feel a lot better and a lot less confused if there was a more open and direct form of communication. I'd like to hear you out in person. This came out of the nowhere. No idea what he's talking about. These kind of messages drive me nuts because they are exactly the kind that make you over think. What problems? What did I feel? What is he talking about? Why is he sending me cryptic messages? Uuughhh.

Bobby

Friday, June 20th, 2014

He sounds like a moron. but he clearly has you around his little finger and he knows it.

laurnz sound like lawnz ok

Wednesday, December 2nd, 2015

ok here go's been out of the game for so long its crazy joined the dating site it free but out of the blue the dating site sent me a match she is a beautiful girl live close to where I do I like her and this what I wrote as an opener Hi sweetie loved your profile I love to have a laugh in a reply yo her profile she is looking for a guy to laugh and that is honest to her so I say I loved her profile and I love to have a laugh too and I said ya I'm here also looking for some one genuine and honest , loving and sweet, down to earth girl ,I don't play games when it comes to finding my one to reply to her as she don't smoke or drink I replied to her saying I don't smoke might have glass wine every three months I look after my self she is 32 I'm 55 keep fit and have pretty youthful out look on life told her I don't have bad habits and I'm just me as I am anyway I said I love to have a coffee or juice and ya even a glass of milk if I have too haha I laughed love to meet see what happens even just to see your smile cause she have a great smile over coffee and mentioned we were not to far from each other like a couple of km's if that a good opener or introduction opener she looks amazing and she said she looking for a guy up to my age so she is beautiful really and want to get off on right foot if we meet haven't yet I'm in start man I hope she reply advice laurnz from Sydney Australia

Texting Tips For Men (And What You Shouldn’t Do!)

About David

Recommended for You:

How to Steal a Girl Away from Her Boyfriend

Why P#ssy Isn’t The Holy Grail!

How to Hit on a Waitress

The Power Of Investing In Yourself

23 Comments | Join the Discussion!

Cancel reply

Adam

Tony

not telling! na na!

KL Chang

Bren

KL Chang

M

Cam

Addo

Bobby

Hans

Mike

john

Bobby

Ray

Janet

Bob

Hans

sean

Addo

Cynthia

Bobby

laurnz sound like lawnz ok