Seduction And Attraction – Taking The Lead With Women

Men's Advice Mindset, Uncategorized

By David Wygant March 21, 2014 334 Shares

Take it from the ORIGINAL dating coach — you DON’T need any “pickup lines” or canned material to EFFORTLESSLY attract any woman you want. Watch this free video now to learn what the “pickup artists” & “seduction gurus” don’t want you to know…

Take the lead What happens if you sit in a car without switching on the engine?

What happens if you sit in the driving seat of a car, and don’t put your feet on the pedals or your hands on the steering wheel?

NOTHING!

And that’s exactly the same thing that happens when you don’t take control with women. You wonder why you find it so hard to turn your dates into relationships. You wonder why you always end up in the friend-zone. You always ask why other guys do so well with women, and you can’t get a girlfriend. Here’s the reason…

You’re not taking control. You’re not taking the lead. Just the same as a car doesn’t go anywhere if you don’t drive it; your relationships with women aren’t going to go anywhere unless you start taking some control. Don’t wait for women to ask you out. Don’t wait for them to text or call you. Don’t always ask them where they want to go on dates. Don’t ask if you can touch or kiss them. Stop being so passive, and start getting involved. Ask women out!

I was talking to an old client the other day, and he was telling me about two women he’d really liked when he was younger. He got on great with these women. They had great rapport, they’d flirt with him, and they’d even stayed at his house. Here’s the thing…

He always assumed they just wanted to be friends, so he never asked them out, he never tried to kiss them, and he never told them how he felt. Apparently he’d run into both these girls on Facebook a while back and reconnected. Do you know what he they told him?

They were chatting about the old days and how they used to flirt etc, and BOTH women said that had he made a move on them they’d have gone out with him. He could have dated two women he was attracted to, but because he was so passive and waited for them to take the lead, he missed out. How many opportunities have you missed because you’re waiting for life to come to you?

It’s time to take the lead. It’s time to take control. And I don’t mean you have to become an A’#hole with women, because you don’t need to be an idiot to take the lead in a relationship. You just need to be decisive, strong, and in control. In the video below, I talk about the power of taking control on relationships, and look at why your life is never going to change until you stop being a big “Mangina” and start being a man!

About David

1.7 million men & women come to me every month to find the secrets to success. And after 20 years of coaching, I’ve discovered the golden keys to success in dating, business, health and wellness, and life.

I’ve helped millions of men and women around the globe achieve success in their dating, social and personal lives. I’m also a father to the world’s cutest little girl, and I am an unapologetic man. Some say I’m nuts, others say I’ve changed their life forever. One thing’s for certain: I’ll always give you the truth, whether you can handle it or not. I never sugar coat anything.

Nice is so overrated. I’d prefer brutally honest breakthrough to a “nice” rut any damn day of the week. If you’re the same way, then you've come to the right place.

74 Comments | Join the Discussion!

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Greg

Friday, March 21st, 2014

This is a great message. I always keep balance and perspective in mind. Things happen in life when they're meant to be. We need to will ourselves, feel through and work towards (however one wants to phrase it) the point where we can feel life coming to us the way we want it to.

Laura N.

Friday, March 21st, 2014

All I can say, it works guys. :)

Yureon

Friday, March 21st, 2014

Well I know this doesn't sound manly but, women have to allow us to take the lead, and not do things that discourage us like they are notorious for. We can initiate approach and "take the lead all day", if you aren't attractive it's "harassment."

Marty

Monday, March 24th, 2014

"We can initiate approach and “take the lead all day”, if you aren’t attractive it’s “harassment.” Not actually true and it's a favourite excuse of the "creepy guys" so I'd cut out using it. Huge difference between "taking the lead" and "harassment".

jorge

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Yureon, You are right. What you said does NOT sound manly. I though you were some kind of ex military. Leading is also necessary in your professional life.

Yureon

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

What does me being in the Army have to do with a point I made?

jorge

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

David, Bravo! A great post. Clear, to the point and so true.

Dave

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

This is a good blog post, but I wish it were only this simple. I engage women, take the lead, and ask them out all the time. Do you know what they say? No. Or they flake. Or they just don't respond. I agree with the principle. But I disagree with the concept that guys aren't getting dates because they're not willing to take the lead or ask for what they want. If you aren't a good looking dude, you're going to struggle no matter what you do. That's not bitterness; it's just reality.

Marty

Monday, March 24th, 2014

"If you aren’t a good looking dude, you’re going to struggle no matter what you do. That’s not bitterness; it’s just reality". Taking the lead isn't going to be the one size fits all fix. Some people are going to say no when you ask for what you want. That's fine. At least by asking for what you want you're respecting your own desires and wishes. As for whether being good looking makes a difference, I've often thought that but have started to wonder lately. I'm not good looking by any stretch of the imagination. Being more forward with what I want whilst not being an asshole has made a big difference in terms of my successes with women.

Greg

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Beliefs. Beliefs... Beliefs!!! If you perceive yourself as not good looking... You won't succeed with women? you will? you will 50% of the time? you will if you have money? if you're friends with the owner of a bar? You can finish the rest of that sentence any way you like. I'd say the sentence is problematic to begin with. Try this: I am good looking. I'm not worried about my looks. I take care of myself and I'm happy. Women would love to date me. If they say no, it means we simply aren't meant to connect at that moment. I'm philosophical about it and don't take it personally. My story: 29. Live with folks. I'm a screenwriter. I've written a TV pilot. Wrote it originally in the fall of 2011, so have been at it for 2.5 yrs. I believe it's only a matter of time before it's sold. I'm not worried that I've been told 'no thanks' from just about every WGA agency, dozen's of production companies, a few networks and even a request for venture capital. I'm not worried that I'm a college drop out, have never taken a screenwriting class, and am pitching the first and only screenplay I've ever written. (Well, now a revision of it... and it's the second if you count a play I wrote and directed in the 6th grade LOL) Wow, I could go on here. I've grown up lower middle class. Never have had to worry about having my basic needs met, though certainly not rich. Right now I'm not working. (This is work... good karma!) My choice. Have very little money. Have debt too. Still not worried. I've never been in GQ and I dropped out of acting classes. I plan to both direct and act in my venture. Not worried about my looks... Just enjoying life. I believe.

Laura N.

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Greg, I would enjoy spending time with you because you are positive and happy even if you life isn't perfect! :)

Greg

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

maybe one day Laura! (my life is perfect for me right now)

Pam

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Greg, good for you. You get the law of attraction and the power of thinking positively. It will happen if you believe. I'm in a similar boat--I was laid off from my job in February and even though the responses to my resume have been slim pickings, I'm not worried, either. I'm bring grateful for this transitional time in my life to figure out what I really want to be doing with it to feel truly fulfilled. The old job had just become a job and I was burned out, so the universe did me a huge favor as far as I'm concerned. I still have a self employment gig managing the social media channels for another company which I've been doing for the past 3 years, and I'm also posting to my blog and doing a lot more writing in general. I'm also training for my first 5K in May and have more time now to keep my workouts regular and consistent. Please let us know when your screenplay gets published.

Greg

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

thanks Pam. I run too used to compete. Actually, I find that as I gain life experience, I can train less and maintain the same (or even a higher) level of fitness.

Yureon

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Yep goes back to my point... It's like when they saw...nothing is hotter than a man who goes right for what he wants and approaches and makes the first move etc etc etc, then when a non hot guy does it...that principle doesn't seem to apply. But that's women, liars and hypocrits.

Bobby M

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

"Don’t ask if you can touch or kiss them." Oh great. Comment shitstorm incoming, which one of the usual negative Nellies wants to start it off? I gotta go make popcorn, be right back

Yureon

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

"They were chatting about the old days and how they used to flirt etc, and BOTH women said that had he made a move on them they’d have gone out with him. He could have dated two women he was attracted to, but because he was so passive and waited for them to take the lead, he missed out. How many opportunities have you missed because you’re waiting for life to come to you?" What stupid gender-role bullshit.

James

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Yureon, I think your input is invaluable. Although I doubt that you really are as uninteresting to women as you think, the reason being that you are, simply said, the opposite of boring, which in my opinion is the number one problem with today's male population. There are so many guys out there who are so boring that you don't even need a sleeping pill anymore. I cannot imagine what it would be like for a woman to go out with these guys. Anyway, a direct approach from an attractive man is considered bold and sexy, while the same behavior from an unattractive guy is called sexual harassment. That is the reality for a lot of men, I see it happen each and every day. That is also the reason why a lot of these guys do not even try anymore. Before you approach a woman, you must at least get a vibe from her, it is something you can feel. If that is not there, it is useless to approach. For a lot of men, that vibe is not there. It is the same by the way for unattractive women.

Marty

Monday, March 24th, 2014

"Anyway, a direct approach from an attractive man is considered bold and sexy, while the same behavior from an unattractive guy is called sexual harassment. That is the reality for a lot of men, I see it happen each and every day. That is also the reason why a lot of these guys do not even try anymore. Before you approach a woman, you must at least get a vibe from her, it is something you can feel. If that is not there, it is useless to approach. For a lot of men, that vibe is not there. It is the same by the way for unattractive women." There is a world of difference between a direct approach and harassment and I'm sorry but the "I just wasn't good looking enough" stuff tends to imply an excuse for the people who actually do go out there to creep out and harass women with no respect for their boundaries. I'm balding, not my ideal weight and not good looking. I can make a direct approach without harassing someone. You don't necessarily have to wait for a vibe or invitation. You just need not to be a dick about things and respect her boundaries. None of that has to do with looks.

Yureon

Monday, March 24th, 2014

You have failed to recongnize the double standard and the comparison made, Let's use the above example provided. ". I’ve gotten dirty looks for saying, “Hi, I’m Dave,” to women." Now let's say there are two Daves... Dave1... Short unattractive no money= dirty looks and indeed perceived as "harassment" or AT THE VERY LEAST "unwelcome attention... Dave 2 I am going to be lazy here and just say he is opposite of Dave 1, says the same thing same tone same approach= idolized. Ah this, "If you are good looking, you get a ton of leeway from most women. If you aren’t good looking, most women give you no leeway at all." There is a comment of mine that states, if you are good looking you are innocent until proven guilty (meaning if you are hot women will give you the time of day to interact UNTIL you fuck up... [ and that is hard] you can go for years of improper treat and get so far as to beating them...and they will blame themselves and assure themselves and others that said guy will "change." If you aren't you are guilty until proven innocent...meaning you better have a yacht or some kind of social value or money or something (connection) before she walks out and you have mere seconds to do so. No need to say this is a "belief" this is as true as birds fly and fish swin, as the sun rises in the east and sets in the west.

Marty

Monday, March 24th, 2014

"Dave1… Short unattractive no money= dirty looks and indeed perceived as “harassment” or AT THE VERY LEAST “unwelcome attention…" Because he's short and has "no money", he's perceived as harassing people? That's not a double standard. It's a bonkers prediction based on the aggressive, sexist idea that all women everywhere punish supposedly "non good looking guys" by reacting to their approaches as if they were harassment. It's nonsense. Different people have different boundaries but harassment vs non harassment is easy to spot and it's not based on how good looking you are. "Dave 2 I am going to be lazy here and just say he is opposite of Dave 1, says the same thing same tone same approach= idolized." Nope. If Dave 2 harasses people, he's gonna get labelled as a harasser whether he's good looking or not. "(meaning if you are hot women will give you the time of day to interact UNTIL you fuck up… [ and that is hard] you can go for years of improper treat and get so far as to beating them…and they will blame themselves and assure themselves and others that said guy will “change.”" Most people will give you ample chances to "fuck up". You have an anger against women. It projects outwards into your beliefs and ideas about women. "If you aren’t you are guilty until proven innocent…meaning you better have a yacht or some kind of social value or money or something (connection) before she walks out and you have mere seconds to do so. No need to say this is a “belief” this is as true as birds fly and fish swin, as the sun rises in the east and sets in the west." It reads more like the paranoid beliefs of a man with huge amounts of aggression towards women and ideas that he somehow doesn't measure up because he doesn't own a yacht. Not trying to be rude here. But seriously, get professional help for your issues before continuing to look for dates. Sorting your issues out does wonders for people.

Dave

Monday, March 24th, 2014

We're going to have to agree to disagree here Marty. I've gotten dirty looks for saying, "Hi, I'm Dave," to women. Do you really think Brad Pitt has ever gotten that reaction? If you are good looking, you get a ton of leeway from most women. If you aren't good looking, most women give you no leeway at all.

Marty

Monday, March 24th, 2014

"We’re going to have to agree to disagree here Marty. I’ve gotten dirty looks for saying, “Hi, I’m Dave,” to women. Do you really think Brad Pitt has ever gotten that reaction? If you are good looking, you get a ton of leeway from most women. If you aren’t good looking, most women give you no leeway at all." I don't know what reaction Brad Pitt gets. He's certainly not popular with all women. I know women who don't fancy him one bit. I'm not questioning your experiences. For all I know, women are treating you badly like that. I don't know. My suggestion would be to recognize that a "dirty look" could mean anything and assuming it's always about us and how we look can be problematic. I went through years of thinking I was ugly, getting dirty looks from women etc. I still get dirty looks these days. The difference is I don't care. Not in an asshole kind of way. If I get any hint I'm actually doing something wrong or creepy, I'll do some self exploration and see if I can alter that behaviour. But if I know I'm doing nothing wrong, dirty looks from women don't concern me. Sometimes she's had a hard day and is just feeling down. It could be not about me at all. I don't know. Best of luck to you, Dave.

Laura N.

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Exactly, James. You *know* when someone is attracted to you. You get that vibe. If you pay attention to her body language when you are talking to her, she will let you know non-verbally that your advances will be welcome. We all laugh about the hair flip, how women will stroke their throat, an arm, or will play with the stem of a wine glass or straw. But those are all signals that she is interested in you. I was on a date last night, and I found myself doing every single one of those things when he and I were talking. And he was not shy to hold my hand, touch my leg, etc. because he was reading my signals correctly. That is how women encourage you, guys. I know it's subtle, and that it is difficult for men, in general, to read our non-verbal cues. But, it comes down to getting out of your own head and really paying attention to her... once you get that vibe James is talking about.

John

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

That's right. But you also *know* when someone is sexually repulsed by you. You can tell by the way she goes out of her way to avoid eye contact with you... Or the way she refuses to make eye contact when you speak to her.. Or the way she is friendly, but cuts the conversation VERY SHORT when you approach her. I get the "sexually repulsed" vibe from nearly every single woman I encounter. (Often at first glance, from as far as 20-30 feet away.) It's rare that I ever get the "interested" vibe. When I do, it's usually from a woman I am not interested in... Or, I am not sure of the vibe I am getting, and just write it off as friendliness. Or, I spot the wedding / engagement ring on her left hand. :/

Yureon

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Again with the belief " system. i could say water is wet and people will still tell me its your beliefs. no it is actual proven fact and experience. It's amazing how people refuse to acknowledge that and maybe make an effort to change it. i always approach/make an effort. guess what? I have in deed thought and said and acted like I am a catch and great to be around...you think I havent? ONCE again, goes back to my point that those who I want to attract will be the judge of that.... Or i can tell them that to their faces as I have done in the past and have them merely and easily deflect it by calling me cocky or just say "well I am sure she will be lucky" (yeah right.) or I can deflect their deflections and assert myself to them no no wait then like I said it becomes unwanted harassment. i do appreciate people like James who recognize this and has also input on how it can be dealt with effectively though. AND AGAIN, the whole you new to read the "vibe" or wait for the signal is what I was talking about. You know them allowing you to do as what is advised in this blog. we can't just assert ourselves otherwise, even if they give signals that isn't a garuntee either. They could say "I was just being polite" etc. so this way no responsibility for how the interaction goes is assumed on their part. it would also help to a degree if your hints weren't as subtle as observing a pebble roll down a mountain.

Laura N.

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Yes, we are allowing you to take the lead. But, most interpersonal communication is non verbal. And it doesn't lie.

Yureon

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

well I have been in situations where none of that "fidgeting" meams anything. i have even asked some women I know about it and they say they do that when they feel uncomfortable and when they are around someone they don't know, and not because they are attracted. Places like askmen say that stuff too (like she is interested or receptive.) yet in real life situations the reasons given to me were pretty much polar opposite. so the next time they do that stuff when I talk to them may not be for a long while I will call them out on it...see what they say then.

Hook90

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

(This may be a dumb question, but going to ask it anyways)...I totally understand what you're saying, but what if something like this happens...I'm talking to a girl and things are going pretty good and I say, " I know this great sushi place, let's go there Saturday.". Then she says something along the lines of," I don't like sushi, but I know a good burger place. Want to go there?" Of course I would say yes because I love a good burger, but would I be relinquishing the lead if I do this? I need to become more assertive, but don't want to come off as demanding.

Yureon

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

Well then if she wants to go to that burger place, then you tell the date and time she is being taken. this way she has to wait for the day and time and for you to once again lead into that interaction.

Andrew

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

even once the man and the woman become exclusive, can you expect or should you expect the woman to do her share of calling and texting first as well? will initiate a make-out session or initiate sex? i'm not talking about the courting period, i'm talking about once the man and the woman have become official

Bob

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Adrew, Once a woman is comfortable with you, has slept with you, and knows she is in a relationship with you, then you don't have to do ALL the initiating of sex, making out, etc. I have had women tear my clothes off, when the get horney, so, no, it is a societal ritual for the man to be "allowed" to take the lead, as Laura states. Actually women don't "allow" men to take the lead, it is what they have been brainwashed, by societal norms, to believe that is the way things are done. Most women would be too insecure, afraid of rejection, and have been taught to have an "entitlement" mentality, when it comes to believing it is the Man's job to take the chances, assume the risks of rejection and failure, and to be able to read women's subtle, and often confusing, (because most women don't even know the proper way to give them) signals, and receptive body language. The good part is, since Women don't even know themselves, in many cases, if they actually like a guy or are on the fence about him, or if she should get involved with him, a confident man, can make up their minds for them, quite easily, if he is skilled at persuasion, and use their indecisiveness to his advantage.

Hans

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Bob ! How did your date with the sisters go ? Details please !

Bob

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Oh, hey Hans, It went great. I am just getting up and around after an exciting time. But, I will no longer be expressing any details of my dating successes and how to "game" women (this is not a derogatory word, as they will probably say), gain female attraction, and sexual interest for the guys here, due the past couple of days getting beat up pretty bad (mainly by the women, who have virtually taken over the men's blog) criticized, chastised and berated me. I have been called out as a fraud numerous times, and always have provided the proof needed to back up my claims (simply so you guys will see that it is true that you can date, and attract multiple women, date as many as you want, etc), yet that seemed to only inflame the criticisms, even worse, once they were proven wrong in their assumptions about me, for reasons I don't understand. I guess it is instinctive to be defensive when your accusations and accuses, are proven to be false by the accused. I don't really understand why you guys want the five or six women on here, providing advice, as fact. They are women, and cannot know a man's struggles, or even what it takes to become a skilled man, who knows how to attract, interact and be successful with women, since many times they themselves can't explain why the like a man. They have no idea of what a man goes through, how he can accomplish achieving the skills necessary, or the trials bestowed on men to attract the opposite sex. I had hoped by expressing my successes with women, it would inspire the men on the blog to ask questions, see that it is indeed possible to be successful, and be a role model, at least in being able to show how to attract women. But, that seems not to be the case, and my experiences apparently came off as bluster, and bragging, so I will only comment on subjects I feel I can show my various opinions and give suggestions about. Best of luck!

Andrew

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

I thought it was mostly an evolutionary instinct for women to be attracted to and expect men to take the lead, men that have leadership qualities? and yes I can agree that to maybe some small extent there is societal conditioning as well

Bob

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Well, Andrew, I guess if you want to go by evolution, and history. It absolutely was the man's job to get a woman that he was interested in. But, things were quite different then. The man was not exactly "asking" her, or gave a shit what she though of him and his skill and "game". He saw a woman he liked, grabbed her, told her what to do, or drug her off to his lair and had his way with her for as long as he pleased. She didn't exactly have much say about it, nor did he care what the hell she thought of him. Do you think that the societal rituals today, for men to woo, and assume all the risks, might be a distortion from "evolution"? If so, the ballfield definitely shifted to the woman's favor since we now have modern society, with laws, women's rights, enforcement skewed towards women's rights etc. Do you believe that with all these advancements for women, that maybe the former evolutionary "rules" might should be adjusted for modern society, and maybe changed somewhat to a more equal footing for men and women in attracting a mate?

Laura N.

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

I can't speak for other women, but I do, Andrew...

Andrew

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

another thing, is the Man being in Charge, being the Head of the Relationship, does that also relate to being Head of the Household as well?

Hans

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Come on, Bob, don't let some fugly old man-hating prunes doubt your successes. Me and plenty of other guys are here to learn, and you are the master (in addition to David of course). Did you get into the sister's pants ? Both of them ?

Brad

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Here we have it, once and for all, straight from the 'Dating and Mating Manual for Neanderthals': women want to be grabbed, claimed, owned, taken by a man with authority, dragged to a cave where they can breed and worship their man-God. It might just be that simple. After all, Eve was created from one of Adam's ribs to be his companion. Too bad the darn serpent tricked the bitch into eating fruit from the forbidden tree. Otherwise we all would still be living in paradise.

Yureon

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

Funny how women have been fucking everything up since biblical times...present day...feminism.

Marty

Monday, March 24th, 2014

"Funny how women have been fucking everything up since biblical times…present day…feminism." Clear from the comments that some men here believe in the fantasy of "society skewed towards female rights". But no, women have not been fucking everything up since biblical times and feminism is not an example of women fucking everything up. Adam and Eve is a story written by men of a certain time. It's bound to be sexist. What worries me the most is why people can't get the distinction between "being a leader" and "being a dick". There's no need to be an asshole or demean women. Being a leader is not being an asshole. It's not women's responsibility to give you whatever it is you happen to want. Other people have desires too. If you're clear and authentic about your desires and respect hers then things start to happen.

Yureon

Monday, March 24th, 2014

LMAO if you think feminism has NOTHING to do with the difficulties of male female interaction today then you are more off than I thought. LOL You are just another blue piller. Example you ever hear of the "I am a girl campaign." Do me a favor go out and find me men and women wearing blue shirts instead of pink with a banner that says "I am a guy." And see if society is donating more money to them than women... I'll give you until 2050 to find it.

Minzy

Saturday, March 22nd, 2014

Thats a good point, Laura. If you know to read all the signals a women throw to you, you reduce your numbers of rejection a lot if you only go for THAT women. Because she is already interested in some way, maybe she feels drawn to you, and the chances are good... On the other hand, if you approach a women who is obviously not interested, but you go for her anyway, because of her looks, hornyness, etc, no wonder that you get rejected a lot more. There is a book out there "Undercover sex signals" you can read and refresh; because I think men naturally know all the signs. But without attention...

Andrew W

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

People argue that men have become feminized in this generation, and one of the factors is sexual harassment laws that were created

Mike

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

Great post, David! I was watching a youtube video on guys using cheesy pick up lines to get a girl's phone number. Some women loved it, no it wasn't the cheesy pick up lines themselves, but when the guy told the girls afterwards that they were doing a video on showing people that even cheesy pick up lines work, two of the best looking ones said it was great because guys have no guts nowadays, it sucks they said. So it wasn't the fact that they liked the cheesy pick up lines per say rather they like the fact they were noticed by a man who took action! Some women nowadays are craving for a guy with some guts because they went in missing in action, that these same women would settle for a pick up line! This is not to advocate pick up lines, I think the best way to connect with a woman is being open, and honest with your intentions, using observations to start a conversation or just saying "hello" ...:)

Laura N.

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

A man who takes action... and isn't an a**hole about it. But, yes, it's best to be honest, open and actually pay attention to the woman you want to connect with. It.Works.

Andrew W

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

Men are the laborers of life and creators of civilizations, hence that's why they are expected to take action

Peter

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

In my experience, waiting for anything to happen usually renders no results. Taking action does. There really is no such thing as failure, because no matter what the result of an action, it will always teach you something.

Andrew W

Monday, March 24th, 2014

The only thing I dislike about taking action, being the assertive one, approaching and asking out is that there is a very thin line that is unfortunately very easy to cross, the line that comes across as being desperate, trying too hard, and just approaching in a normal calm relaxes masculine way which is obviously attractive to women

John

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

Reading through the comments here... "Women want a man who takes action..." , etc.. "we are allowing you to take the lead" "you *know* when someone is attracted to you" And then the guys postings about sexual harassment.. Etc.. I think I know what the big disconnect is here on this blog. Looking at the picture on the avatars.. as far as I can tell, I am the ONLY, truly, physically unattractive person to post a photo of myself on this site. All of the women here, who have posted a photo, are attractive. All of the guys, who have had the guts to post a photo of themselves, with the exception of myself, are decent looking guys, in decent shape. I'm assuming the people who won't post a photo of themselves, won't do so because they are too unattractive, and they don't want people to see. (as for me, I just don't give a shit what people think.) What we have here is just a bunch of attractive women, who have NO IDEA, and NEVER WILL have any idea what it's like to be an unattractive guy. They can't. They can NEVER experience it. Plus, they don't get approached by unattractive guys, ever, because unattractive guys won't waste their time. The honest to god truth is, LOOKS ARE ALL THAT MATTERS WHEN IT COMES TO DATING. PERIOD. A good looking guy is going to be bold, because he knows he is a good looking guy. An ugly guy isn't going to wast his time because he knows there is no chance. Seriously, if me and a guy who looks like Brad Pitt were in a mall, and we both walked up to the same attractive girl, and said... "Hey.. I saw you over here and I just HAD to come over here and meet you! C'mon,, right now,, you and me are gonna grab a cup of coffee,, because I have GOT to get to know you better. C'mon." Does anyone here really think we would get the same reaction? My guess is... The good looking people on the board who have posted a picture of themselves are going to tell me "yes. It's all your attitude. Confidence is what matters" ... Because they have NEVER experienced what it is like to be unattractive. And, the guys who haven't posted a picture of themsevles, who know they are not that attractive, and have experienced the reactions from women when they do something like that... Will agree with me. That's why there will never be agreement on this blog. It's simply the reality of good looking people vs. the reality of people who aren't.

John

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

And, before everyone gets their panties up in a bunch... I'm not saying everyone who hasn't posted a photo is ugly. I'm just guessing, because I haven't seen any unattractive people post a photo, and there seems to be a trend as to who is on which side of every argument.

Bobby M

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

I'm a hot piece of ass. B)

John

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

Let me throw one other thing out there too... As for the guys who say women are going to scream "sexual harassment" and stuff like that... That is NEVER going to happen. In the scenario I laid out, between myself, and a Brad Pitt looking guy.. The reaction the Brad Pitt looking guy is going to get is... She's going to get wide eyed, smile big, and say.. "YES! Let's go get that coffee!! " The reaction the guy who looks like me is going to get is... "wow! .. Ummm... I'm really flattered.. You seem like a really nice guy... But.. Jeez.... I have a boyfriend. Sorry!.. I would.. Honestly... But, sorry. But I'm really glad you asked! Gotta go.. Bye. It was REALLY NICE meeting you though." They will never yell harassment, or be mean, or insult you. Just say "ok, well thanks anyway", and eject.

Mike

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

I seen a guy who was pretending to be fat, he had the inflatable under his large sweater. He was conducting an experiment to show guys looks are not as important as personality to women. He approached women with confidence, I wouldn't say total confidence, at times he looked a little nervous. He talked to women, connected to them, and got some phone numbers.

Bob

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

yeah but he was probably still talland good looking and had a load of confidence since he was used to talking to women.even good looking dudes can get away with a little Paunch. headed back to the ranch,can't wait to see my good oklahoma country galswaiting for me.not to mention cowboyin up and getting back on my horses. yeehaw

John

Monday, March 24th, 2014

I saw the simple pickup guys do that in one of their videos. They put Jason in a fat suit, and sent him out to get numbers. He got a few, but they were probably fake. (I'm sure most of the numbers simple pickup gets are fake. They never call to find out. Plus, they have every girl they approach sign a waiver. If they don't sign it, they blurr their faces out. So, the girls know what's up.) Either way, he knows he doesn't look like that in real life, is full of confidence, and they are all funny as shit. They don't care about the numbers they get because it's just to make videos. Besides, as we all know, numbers don't mean SHIT. A girl will give you her number just to get you to go away. Plus, they always hit colleges to shoot videos, and get numbers. College girls give their numbers out pretty freely. They just give their cell numbers out, then screen for people they actually want to talk to. There are plenty of "blocker apps" out there.

Hans

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

I take it that a lot of guys feel like a woodpecker in a petrified forest when it comes to getting the attention of attractive females. What John says above is the truth: a good looking guy or girl can never know what it is like to be ugly and unattractive. It is a totally different world.

John

Monday, March 24th, 2014

No, they can't Hans. Me, I know EXACTLY how it is from BOTH SIDES. I used to be 155 lbs, and in great shape. Honestly, if you are a guy, if you are just in "decent" physical shape, women are going to find you more attractive than 90% of men out there. Back when I was younger looking, in great shape, and my skin wasn't ruined as badly yet from all the cystic acne, not to mention all the damage from the medication themselves.... The reactions I got back then were night and day from the looks / reactions I get now. I was still a nervous wreck around women. Bartending took care of the approach anxiety, because I didn't need to approach. They came to me. But, the looks I got from women were a whole lot different than what I get now. This long, never ending, winter has left me in terrible shape. I spend so much time "boredom eating", and not working out, that I put on A LOT of weight. I jumped on the scale today and nearly had a heart attack when I saw the number looking at me. I'm cutting back on the carbs / sugar. I went to the gym today. (God I'm gonna be sore tomorrow.) It just takes so long to get into shape. It's such a long process. Watching all the really hot girls working out, with their perfect fit bodies, in their tight workout clothes, and thinking to myself how I have ZERO chance of getting a girl like that, is so depressing. It makes me want to not go back. But I have to get back with it. Gotta get back in shape. No choice.

Andrew W

Monday, March 24th, 2014

I literally stopped drinking soda, and started exercising, working out again 2 years ago, I lost like 45 pounds, used to be 215 now I weigh 170lbs!, went from a waist 40 to a waist 34!

Bob

Monday, March 24th, 2014

God, the blog is so quiet, and relaxing, without the obnoxious, narcissistic, and hypocritical women jabbering endlessly.

Bob

Monday, March 24th, 2014

We need Mel (guess she got hooked up again, poor dateless thing) and Julie/Old Fat dude living in basement, to chime back in...Well, guess it's time to put my cowboy avatar back up. Be at the ranch tomorrow night. Already got my room and date with the schoolteacher set up for the Hardrock Fri and Sat night. Relaxing at the SUPER 8 (trying to piss David off) tonight...

Jeremiah

Monday, March 24th, 2014

hurray for the bob and john circle jerk. John gives out the excusses and bob gives the reach around

Rick L

Monday, March 24th, 2014

Unattractive ppl can't understand unattractive ppl, women can't understand men, fat can't understand skinny, white can't understand black, tall can't understand short........... Are there any ______ (free feel to fill in the blank with unattractive, short, fat, broke- any word you choose that "stops" your success with women or life) ppl dating or in relationships? And, if one or more of these ppl visit the blog and share their successful experience with women will that change any__________ (unattractive, short, fat, broke, etc) person's mind on this blog? NO

Andrew W

Monday, March 24th, 2014

A lot of guys are assertively taking action, approaching women but they still get accused of sexual harassment or being creepy even though they are not intentionally doing that, although I don't believe that has been the case for me recently, it's just a lot of women are too damn paranoid unfortunately

Andrew W

Monday, March 24th, 2014

I believe body language is more critical than what you say comes out of your mouth right?

Andrew

Tuesday, April 8th, 2014

Yes the man being the approaches, initiator, predates feminism by Centuries or maybe Millenniums, and yes a man is not forced to approach a woman he is interested in but he has no choice but to take action and approach one if he wants to have a girlfriend, that's where he is forced to but only if he wants a girlfriend

Andrew

Tuesday, March 8th, 2016

and apparently a man is supposed to embrace, enjoy taking the lead, leading the interaction, taking control, why should a man not hate or detest it?

Seduction And Attraction – Taking The Lead With Women

About David

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