Perception vs. Reality (Podcast)

Men's Advice Mindset, Uncategorized

By David Wygant February 6, 2013 366 Shares

Nowadays, dating is more competitive than it’s ever been — download this free report to learn 6 proven skills to stand apart & succeed in the modern dating world.

podcast with david wygant This is one of the last Podcasts that I actually recorded from a boot camp.

The amazing thing about what I do is that I record almost everything.

You should come and see my hard drives. I’ve got two of them filled with endless audio recordings and videos. Stuff that I’ve never released to the public before.

Today, I decided I’m going to release this one I did at a recent boot camp called Perception vs. Reality.

How many times have you been out where you met a woman and you perceived her that she really was into you?

This was an interesting topic that we talked about before we went out into the field that night. One of my major goals with each attendee is to kill all his perceptions and really ground him into the reality of dating, approaching, and reading signals.

This is one of my favorite topics, and I thought all of you would enjoy it today, especially with Valentine’s Day coming up in about a week. A lot of women right now are lonely, looking for a man, and wanting to meet somebody. So maybe if you’re a little more dialed into reality, maybe you’ll hook up before Valentine’s Day.

Listen and learn:

Nowadays, dating is more competitive than it’s ever been — download this free report to learn 6 proven skills to stand apart & succeed in the modern dating world.

About David

1.7 million men & women come to me every month to find the secrets to success. And after 20 years of coaching, I’ve discovered the golden keys to success in dating, business, health and wellness, and life.

I’ve helped millions of men and women around the globe achieve success in their dating, social and personal lives. I’m also a father to the world’s cutest little girl, and I am an unapologetic man. Some say I’m nuts, others say I’ve changed their life forever. One thing’s for certain: I’ll always give you the truth, whether you can handle it or not. I never sugar coat anything.

Nice is so overrated. I’d prefer brutally honest breakthrough to a “nice” rut any damn day of the week. If you’re the same way, then you've come to the right place.

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Douglas

Wednesday, February 6th, 2013

Amazing podcast! Thanks for sharing.

yavo

Wednesday, February 6th, 2013

Volume is too low. I hope you will do something about it next time. Anyway - nice talk, thank you :)

David L.

Wednesday, February 6th, 2013

The idea of Perception v. Reality is a paradox. In my opinion, there is no reality, only perception. Your idea of reality may be different from my idea of reality. Thus, we're left with only perception. This topic is very subjective.

Peter

Wednesday, February 6th, 2013

Great podcast. Really, the only thing that counts is what happens in reality. Your thoughts are completely irrelevant.

John

Wednesday, February 6th, 2013

I wish I wasn't ugly. :(

Technoboy

Friday, February 8th, 2013

Hi, my name is Technoboy. I'm 6'0 190lb of raw man-muscle, can write my own tickets career wise, and I'm on this blog because my track record with women is so bad that the National Society of Manhood just wrote me a letter saying they can legally redeclare my virginity. How are you today? And did I tell you about my handsome ironman triathlete buddy or competitive boxing financial analyst buddy who are almost in the same boat? Or my beer bellied buddies who can have any woman they want? But I repeat myself! Hey, have you tried practicing your smile in front of your rearview mirror while waiting at a light or getting stuck in traffic? A smile is a facelift you get for free, and I can't tell you how often I've heard women say they like a guy's smile. Better yet have more than one smile. And I think dress + style helps too. I got myself this great big hat for swing dancing and it's getting more attention than I am! I use it as a prop or talking point frequently - finding variations on having it stolen from my head + stealing it back again etc. Conversation starting TShirts or accessories are good too. And let's not forget tone of voice!! I think this is probably the most overlooked point, more important than looks. I noticed that without fail, everyone I know who is lucky in love sounds unusually good when he talks. So my new stuck in traffic exercise is to memorize + recite + record Dr Seuss stories in different voice tones.

Peter

Wednesday, February 6th, 2013

Is that you, John ? Are you a Klan member now ?

Peter

Wednesday, February 6th, 2013

Damn...I thought you (your avatar that is) look like the Grand Dragon of the Dating Realm... I was wrong, apparently.

John

Wednesday, February 6th, 2013

Dude... That's the elephant man. Not a freakin' Klan member! The Klan wears white hoods... Not a grey sack over their heads. Jeez.

Henry

Wednesday, February 6th, 2013

Sensei David-- Thank you for sharing this podcast! It reinforces one of the main ideas that I learned from the two boot camps, which is to invite women into my reality by being real and share enthusiasm about my own life with them. It's such a powerful teaching as I experienced it first hand hanging out with you. Now I feel empowered to invite women into my life, and move onto the next one should they chose not to accept my invite.

Jim

Wednesday, February 6th, 2013

Great podcast David, very insightful. Thank you for sharing your knowledge. :)

nico

Wednesday, February 6th, 2013

Please record it in a higher volume because it is very hard to listen for me.

Dave

Wednesday, February 6th, 2013

Awesome podcast David. Thank you!!

Erick

Wednesday, February 6th, 2013

I figured out that sarcasm doesnt work because people take you seriously at first ._. haha

Mike

Thursday, February 7th, 2013

Great podcast, David! It's a subject that I have experienced quite often in my life. I was getting my hair cut by one of the cutest gals, I had ever seen. Not only that, but she gave me the best haircut since I have been going to that particular location! She was very attentive. She engaged me, asked some personal questions. Some of which I throw it back and asked her...lol I teased her, challenged her. She even started teasing me, she asked if I wanted to see the back of my head where she just finished cutting, I said, "yes" she asked a few more times with a smile on her face. Yea, she could hear me, I could tell by her tone, she was teasing me...lol So when she finally placed the mirror in back of my head, I couldn't see my head...lol She asked a couple of times if I could see with a smile on her face. Finally she switched mirrors and then I told her I could see, she didn't respond, I told her again, then I looked at her straight in the eyes and told her I could see, she smiled and giggled...lol I felt like we went in and out of costumer mode. After my hair was done, it was back into consumer mode. Interestingly, it didn't seem she was expecting a tip, she rather looked surprised when I gave her one. I generally always give a tip, I tip higher if they do a better job with my hair. Was I in customer mode with her? I have mixed feelings because the conversation was fun, more fun than I had with any of the other girls, and there was some personal talk but there was also like she gave me the exact block where she lived...lol Bu there was sales talk which was customer mode, would I like some gel today? She asked. I told her "no" I have plenty of that at home. She smiled. Next time she does my hair, I will know for sure. Regardless on what mode it was, we had fun!

John

Thursday, February 7th, 2013

She was talking to you, and smiling, because that's her JOB. If everyone who has a conversation with a hairstylist can consider that to be "success with women", then all of the dating coaches might as well just quit right now, because we are all MASTER PUAs.

Mar

Thursday, February 7th, 2013

Hey Mike, Is that the type of fun that you REALLY wanted to have with her? Phone number? Date? So, the next time you're her customer, you'll see what exactly? I think it's too difficult to determine the true interest level of a CSR. Sure, we can be playful with them but does that mean they will become a part of our dating life? Probably not? But, there's nothing wrong with playfully engaging them. I just think we shouldn't make more of it than what it is. Practice for the real thing.

Hans

Thursday, February 7th, 2013

I had the weirdest perception vs reality experience today. There is this woman at the gym, she is in really good shape, all the guys look at her butt and breasts all the time, because both are fairly irresistible. I talk to her sometimes, but when I ask her about herself, she always gives really evasive answers. She tells me she is writing a book. Well, that doesn't pay the bills, I guess. She also often doesn't show up for months in a row, and when she comes back, she says she has been traveling. Anyway, I am thinking to myself: there is only one way this lady can possibly make her money. Nothing wrong with that, it's a lucrative business. I saw her again this afternoon, and I noticed that she had a special bicycle, an electrical one. I joked about it, because in general, only really old people have those. Well, here comes reality. I don't know why she didn't mention it earlier, but it appears that she has a severe neuromuscular disease that progressively gets worse. It is particularly bad in cold weather (now), and she sometimes cannot move for weeks and months. She spends a lot of time in and out hospitals and in rehab. I was shocked, not so much by what she told me, but by my own assumptions. It also makes me wonder what else people are hiding...

Technoboy

Thursday, February 7th, 2013

That is a GREAT story, Hans. What an eye opener! Thank you for that. And good move on noticing the electric bike + calling her out on it. I have a decent one from recently too. Woman keeps coming + leaving with a different guy to all these dance events. Because she's living car free and needs to get rides from people who have cars, that's why. Plus just to make the story more interesting, she is naturally open and flirtatious to most people, but rarely romantically interested in anyone. I bet some of our more assumption-friendly onlookers think she's a female PUA and I am one of her many conquests haha.

Mike

Friday, February 8th, 2013

Hey Mar, You can date anyone, even a hired gun or a stylist, it don't matter! I wasn't "practicing" with her, I was just being myself. I was showing off more of my personality to people whom I hardly know while trying to get to know them. Generally what she seen from me, is usually with friends whom I known for awhile. You asked about my interest in her. I have to get to know her more to decide if I want to hang out with her or not. She was fun to talk to and so are a lot of people! But there are things I look for in a woman. Generally in these situations where I know I might see her again in a service type place, I take it slower than normal. If it was a situation where I wasn't sure or I know I most likely wouldn't see her again, then I would have asked her to hang out sometime and see where that leads...When I asked my ex-g/f out, I talked to her a few times before I decided to get her number and ask her out.

Mar

Friday, February 8th, 2013

It's natural to be ourselves in the presence of friends. Showing more of your personality to people you hardly know is a new practice of yours, correct?

Mike

Friday, February 8th, 2013

John, You say it was her JOB to flirt with me. Well my brother meet his ex-g/f when she was a stylist, she did his hair. Eventually they went out and had a relationship for 8 years, something that may seem impossible to you! :)

Melissa

Friday, February 8th, 2013

Most of the stylists I know are super flirty. Men and women. They want you to become a regular client and they do so by complimenting you, making you feel good about yourself, so when you need another haircut, you go to the person that made you feel good. Maybe she was flirting....regardless, next time you need a hair cut, that's where you're going to go, right? Ask her out and you'll know what her motive was...

john

Friday, February 8th, 2013

Every hair stylist that ever cut my hair flirted with me. Every single one of them, regardless of wether they had a wedding ring on or not. That is their job. That is what they do. Always the same script.. 1. Ok what are we going to do today ..( with your hair ) 2. So, do you have the day off... 3. What do you do... 4. How long? 5. So how was your weekend.. 6. How about your sideburns? Neck? Etc. 7. ( shows back of head ) would you like some gel? Done. Take payment. Thank for tip ( act surprised ) next CUSTOMER. Always the exact same script everytime. Lots of smiling, flirty voice, pretending to be interested in what you do, and your weekend, what you did for fun, etc. This is how they build male clientele. It's what cosmotology school teaches them. They don't get requests by name and repeat business by not pretending to be interested. No offense.. it just cracks me up when guys get attention from a HIRED GUN ( and yes, hair stylists are hired guns) and consider that "success with women". If that's success, then I'm Don Juan.

Hans

Friday, February 8th, 2013

Over here in Germany, hair stylists use the exact same script, every single time. Must be a worldwide thing, a global code used by hair stylists. I agree with you, John, considering their behavior 'flirting' is almost pitiful. It's like telling people 'I had sex with 50 women last month...they were all hookers, but they really liked me'.

Mar

Friday, February 8th, 2013

Don Juan John- make that your new persona! From now on, I want to hear about all the women you have to beat off you with a stick.

Nathalie

Friday, February 8th, 2013

Interesting hairstylist discussion lol I come from a family who has been part of the beauty industry..My dad owns a hair salon and I do see and yes it is part of his job to be friendly and outgoing with his clients, I actually roll my eyes every time I go because usually the ladies flirt incredibly with him loll I will say my mom met my dad because he asked her out while doing her hair while she was visiting Europe... As far as the complimenting well people in the hair and makeup industry usually notice features closely and will genuinely compliment people on their good points. But good stylists usually also point out things like whether your hair is dry, fine etc..

Mike

Saturday, February 9th, 2013

I was wondering where the women went to in this blog...lol Over the years, I have gotten various reactions from hair stylists. Not all of them were big time flirts. Previously, I was getting my hair done by the manager of the place...lol She was friendly, but wasn't flirting, never asked me personal questions, mostly how I wanted my hair done and she did my hair a few times over the past two years. I have never asked one of them out, nor do I have a regular stylists I go to. I haven't felt any of the girls who did my hair earned the right for me to request them in particular. Not even this latest one despite the fact I talked to her the most compared to the others. That is not to say none of them did good jobs with my hair they have. Do I have to go out with one of them to make such a request? No! But since I am a good tipper, I am more on guard on what their motivates might be and the one I would request would have to be pretty special (honest with her intentions). And your right Melissa, when I go back and have my hair done again by the same gal, I'll ask her out and then I will know her motives. David mentions how personal they get with you as a sign of whether or not your in the customer zone, or not. I also look at how they flirt, if it's a controlled type flirt where I don't see any nervousness, then I know what they are up to. It's a combination of things.

Melissa

Saturday, February 9th, 2013

Cute hairdressers must get asked out all the time if what John describes is something he considers 'flirting'....it's not. It's just engaging a customer.

LoveForever

Wednesday, February 13th, 2013

When she asks, "can I help you?" I believe the correct answer is "Yes, I'm looking for a woman who wants to change me." hahahaha That will work ;)

Perception vs. Reality (Podcast)

About David

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30 Comments | Join the Discussion!

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Douglas

yavo

David L.

Peter

John

Technoboy

Peter

Peter

John

Henry

Jim

nico

Dave

Erick

Mike

John

Mar

Hans

Technoboy

Mike

Mar

Mike

Melissa

john

Hans

Mar

Nathalie

Mike

Melissa

LoveForever