Riding A WaveI went out with my friend Brett for the 4th July. We didn’t do anything crazy. We had a very mellow night. As most of you know, I’m not a big holiday party type of guy anyway. In fact, I always see the holidays as very lonely times for some people. Some people want something so badly to happen in their lives, so they desperately try to get themselves invited to some party. Once they’re in, they have such high expectations. This is going to be “their night.”

Nine times out of ten, the party never delivers on the expectations. In fact, most the time the party is full of other people also wishing for something to happen in their lives. So you’re at a barbeque and everyone is wishing and praying this is the night they meet someone. Everyone is hoping this is going to be their night. You’re in a room full of hopers, wishers, and pleaders.

Hopers, wishers, and pleaders never succeed in life, because the word hope means they don’t believe. The word wish means you don’t think you can do it and need some kind of spiritual intervention, and pleaders render themselves helpless. I want to share a mindset with you, all hopers, wishers, and pleaders need to adopt unless they want to live with regrets.

Life is a wave. You have to ride it. When you have opportunities in front of you, take advantage of them. If you get a business opportunity come your way, grab it. You never know when you’ll get another. If you meet someone amazing, ask them out. You may never see them again. Recognize that in life, when an opportunity presents itself to you, you have to let go of fear.

You need to let go of any negative thoughts about how things COULD turn out, and just go for it. Opportunities only knock once in life. They knock in different ways throughout your life, but if you look back at the opportunities you’ve had in your life, you’ll see how many you’ve actually wasted. But don’t get upset about it. Life is full of “shoulda, woulda, couldas.” You could spend days telling yourself, “There are a ton of houses I should have brought. I should have invested in those stocks when I had the chance. That amazing woman I passed on, I should have married her.”

The key to achieving goals in your life, is to keep moving forward without regrets. Just learn to recognize opportunities when they show up, and ask yourself how bad will you feel if you miss out on them. Going through the fear is always much less painful than the disappointment of not taking advantage of opportunity. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a woman you meet, or job offer, or the chance to buy a house. Whatever it is, the key is to recognize when the waves are coming. Surfers learn to do it all the time. If you ever watch surfers on the beach, they’re always looking for that wave.

What Are You Afraid Of?

I truly believe there are perfect waves coming in your lives on a regular basis. The question is what fears are holding you back from riding those waves?

You’re allowing those fears to hold you back from so many things you truly want and desire. How many times do you meet someone you’re attracted to, and you do want to be with them, but you play it cool and end up losing them to someone else?

If you’d have just jumped in with two feet, and grabbed the opportunity she could have been yours. So the next time you see an opportunity, recognize your fears, write them down, embrace them, and then walk through them. Realize your fears are just fears. Fear is an emotion, and not a solid thing you can touch. Walk through it. They’re thoughts and feelings in your brain, and you can choose to feel differently.

Whatever happened to you in the past isn’t going to repeat itself. It probably won’t happen again. Make peace with your fears and learn to ride the waves. I’ve seen so many people reach the end of their lives with regrets because they didn’t ride the wave when they had the chance. Life isn’t giving them any more waves, and now it’s too late. Take advantage of all the beautiful things life presents to you, because one day when those opportunities aren’t there, you can’t do anything about it.