How to Make the First Move

You’re on a date.  You like her.  You’re attracted to her and you want to make the first move.

Well here’s something I’m going to share with you that’s going to be totally different than anything you’ve ever thought of before.  The first move has nothing to do with a kiss.  The first move has to do with how you connect emotionally with her.

I’m not talking about you becoming an emotional mess that’s crying and telling her your life story about how your dog passed away when you were 11 and haven’t been the same ever since.

The first move always comes down to you listening.  The more you’re listening the more she relates, the more she connects emotionally with you, the more she’s going to want to do something physical with you.  That is the all-important first move.

A lot of guys will go out on a date and won’t really be fully present.  They’re thinking about the kiss at the end and they want to seal the deal and think about how they potentially escalate with her.  Then by the time they do that she always go and pushes them away.

You get the cheek instead of the lips.

The first move is not what you think.  The first move is something far greater.  It’s when two minds connect, hearts see one another, and two people are open, honest, and authentic with one another.  That to me is the first move.

During the course of a date, as you’re connecting and listening to one another and having fun, you want to glance into each others eyes as often as you can.  Look at each other, stare at one another, feel one another.

Then here’s what you want to do:

You want to slowly touch her.  Touch her arm, touch her hand.  When she gets up, maybe hold her hand as you walk out.  Put your hand on the small of her back as she goes out the door as you let her out the door first.  Open the car door for her.

Hold her hand when you’re driving.

First moves.  These are all things you need to do before you even go in for any type of kiss because these are the things that are going to make her feel super comfortable with you.

You see, the first move is about building comfort and a lot of people don’t do that.  A lot of people just want to make a move.

And the move to them is always something very physical, when in reality it’s really not the physical side.  It’s the little physical things.  It’s the emotional things, it’s the words.  There’s much more  you can do when you make a first move.

Think about this: if you do all these things, slowly but surely over the course of the night, guess what she’s going to crave. She’s going to crave a kiss.  You see, it’s a build up.  Everything is like long extended foreplay and when you build it up, she builds up.  She builds up, the tension builds up, the feeling builds up between the two of you.

And then when you go in for the kiss, and instead of her moving her cheek away and you getting air, her lips are on top of your lips.

As your lips go in, her lips go in.  Her mouth opens, your mouth opens.  Then all of a sudden you’re sharing a beautiful, loving french kiss and she’s anticipated every single bit of it.  Now that’s how you make the first move.