I Want a Hummer By David Wygant

We had a server issue the last 2 days and I apologize for any problems you may have had getting on the blog.

My tech guy worked through the night fixing it….ok maybe not through the night but you get my attempted humor!!

Today we needed a break from yesterdays highly emotional topic. Today we get to think about something more fun, plus i have an amazing workout podcast at the end of todays blog for all!

Have a great day!!! I in am back NYC for the next few days……Have any of you ever hung out in Mystic CT?

Wow what a pretty part of the country! My mother just moved there and I spent the last few days poking around the coastal towns.
I have to confess, that i was this close to walking into one of the real estate brokers office and looking at homes.

It was so peaceful and mellow up there!!!

When I was in high school growing up, all I ever wanted was a hummer. I used to walk the halls all the time, looking at the hotties from Laura Stewart to Christa Santangelo to Inky Olson to Amy Huddish to Lisa Rutman to Allison Williams… all I ever thought about was getting one of these girls to give me a hummer!

What would it take? Did I need to beg? Did I need to plead? Did I need to ask for the hummer? What was I doing wrong?

Apparently, nothing – now, I can go get a hummer whenever I want – I can walk into a Chevy dealership, put down $650 a month, and I get a hummer!

A man that drives a hummer is really a man that has blowjob envy. Who wants to drive a blowjob? I’d rather receive a blowjob, and enjoy a blowjob, then pay $4.77 per gallon to drive around in my blowjob!

I really do not want to spend $4.77 per gallon to drive around a bright yellow blowjob, or as most guys refer to it, a Hummer.

So all of you out there who drive these things, you really do have blowjob envy!

And let’s talk about some of these other macho cars there are out there these days – what does it say about a guy that drives an Avalanche? Is he someone that likes danger? What is he looking for with an Avalanche? Is he looking for a woman with G-spot squirting orgasms? What exactly is an Avalanche?

Or a Tahoe. What, are you driving a lake? I’d rather go to Lake Tahoe, hang out, and have some fun, than drive one of those big Tahoes around.

It’s funny that a lot of cars resemble what a lot of men wish that they were.

I have a friend who has a beautiful home with a beautiful view, and every time he throws a party he makes sure that his Ferrari is parked in the driveway. Whenever women come over there, they always whisper to me, “David, why does your friend have to park his penis in the driveway?”

It’s really funny – men and their cars. Men talk about horsepower, men talk about revving high – but the only engine that I ever want to rev high is the engine of a beautiful woman.

I drive a Saab – what does that make me? Someone who complains, someone who whines? David drives a Saab, and he sobs all the time. Really, what does that make me? I’m a Saab driver. I’ve had a lot of Saabs. I’ve had BMWs, and I’ve had Audis – I’ve driven just about every car under the rainbow.

But I’ve never driven a blowjob – I’ve only received one. And I’ve never wanted to be in an avalanche – not in Colorado or in one of those big little pickup trucks.

And what’s up with the Navigator? I’d rather BE the navigator. I’d rather be the guy that takes the woman on an adventure instead of having to go drive around in a Navigator. “I drive a Navigator” – I can’t even say it!

But then again, there is the man that drives a little Chevy Cavalier. What does make him? Cute and perky? “Look! Cavalier guy!”

Car names are really funny. What does your car say about you?

And for women, what do you look for in a guy that drives a car – what do you look for in the car?

What about the car with the little horse as the symbol – the Mustang. Are you a guy that has stud envy? Do you drive a Mustang because you have trouble getting it up? You wish you were a mustang – “I’m a mustang.”

And what about a Ferrari? Do you want to be some good-looking, well-dressed Italian guy but you’re really the guy whose belly touches the steering wheel in his Ferrari and he barely fits into it?

Or what about a Touareg? What exactly is a Touareg?

What exactly is a Cayenne? As far as I know, a cayenne is actually a type of pepper that you put on your food that makes you cry when you speak. But what happens if you drive a Cayenne? Are your eyes supposed to water when you touch the steering wheel because of all of the pepper that is in the car?

Car names are very funny. They are made to be macho. But when push comes to shove, I’ll gladly receive a hummer instead of driving one.

Today we go over the best summer workout. Do you want to get into great shape this summer? Do y0u desire that beach body by the 4th of July?

This podcast is a must for any man or woman who wants to get into killer shape this summer!!!