friends with benefitsA “friends with benefits” relationship!

If you’ve been single for a while, or just don’t want to settle down with a man right now, a friends with benefits set-up might work for you. But if you are thinking of becoming someone’s f#’kbuddy then there are a few things I need to point out to you. In fact, here are the 4 things you MUST know before you become a friend with benefits!

Some Men Won’t Be Flexible

I’m not talking about being flexible in bed. I’m not talking about acrobatic lovemaking tricks. I’m talking about a man who only sees you when HE chooses to see you. You might call or text him when you’re feeling lonely, and he’ll be too busy chasing other women. Even though you’re not in a committed relationship, you still want a man who is happy to come and see you when you’re in the mood, not just when he’s in the mood.

Sure, these relationships are casual, but they can still get messy if you’re with the wrong man! If you’re with a guy who only wants to see you on his terms, it’s never going to work out. In fact, you’re probably going to end up feeling worse about it than if you were in a relationship with him. It could be to do with wanting what you can’t have!

He Can Lose Respect For You!

That’s right. Your friends with benefit setup can suddenly turn nasty if he starts losing respect for you. He won’t contact you for weeks, then he’ll suddenly pop up and ask for sex. Then the second he’s done, he jumps up and leaves, instead of staying the night like he used to. When a man comes over, pumps, dumps, and leaves it’s a sign your friendship is taking a negative turn.

He’s lost all respect for you, and now all he’s doing is literally masturbating inside you!

Staying the night or at least spending a little time with you is a sign he actually cares. By spending time with you, he’s treating you like a genuine friend. Now he’s just pumping and dumping, he’s treating you no differently than he’d treat a prostitute. That is when things get unhealthy!

You Could Ruin Your Friendship

How do you end your friends with benefits relationship in a way that doesn’t kill off your friendship? If it gets ugly then the relationship is already dead. If you think he’s treated you poorly, there really isn’t a friendship left. If you’re stopping the relationship on good terms there won’t be any weird moments when you meet in the street.

Why would you want to end your friends with benefits relationship?

Maybe you’ve met someone you want to get serious with, or perhaps you just want to settle down and find your Mr. Right for life. If you’re kind and gentle about ending your setup, your friend should respect your decision and it shouldn’t affect your relationship.

You Risk Becoming Attached

You have to realize, you could start developing feelings for your friend. It’s a big mistake and a sign you need to take a step back. When you get feelings, you start to imagine yourself as boyfriend and girlfriend, and your expectations of the relationship change altogether. Most women don’t understand that the chances of you taking this relationship and turning it into something more serious are slim and none. It does happen, but VERY rarely.

If you’re in a casual relationship with a friend and you start getting feelings, don’t talk to your other friends about it. Unless you sense your friend feels the same way, get out and get out fast. I’ve seen women carry on in relationships like this for years, and it’s like being stuck in a cul-de-sac. You’re never going to get out, you’re never going to get it, you’re never going to get anywhere.

As nice as it sounds to be in a friends with benefits relationship, they can be very dangerous, and you need to think very carefully before you get involved!