Be Proactive, Have Fun, And Talk To People

Men's Advice Uncategorized, Videos

By David Wygant August 12, 2013 254 Shares

Nowadays, dating is more competitive than it’s ever been — download this free report to learn 6 proven skills to stand apart & succeed in the modern dating world.

So many guys find it difficult to talk to women.

Hell, a lot of guys find it difficult to talk to anybody!

If you spend all your time worrying about what you’re going to say to someone, or whether they’re going to like you, you’re missing out on so much. Forget being perfect. Stop worrying about sounding like a goof-ball. Life is about connecting with people and having fun. In this video I show you how to talk to people, and how to get out your comfort zone so you can have fun, and start enjoying the process of communicating.

You never know when your dream girl’s going to pass you in the street!

Check out the video below.

Nowadays, dating is more competitive than it’s ever been — download this free report to learn 6 proven skills to stand apart & succeed in the modern dating world.

About David

1.7 million men & women come to me every month to find the secrets to success. And after 20 years of coaching, I’ve discovered the golden keys to success in dating, business, health and wellness, and life.

I’ve helped millions of men and women around the globe achieve success in their dating, social and personal lives. I’m also a father to the world’s cutest little girl, and I am an unapologetic man. Some say I’m nuts, others say I’ve changed their life forever. One thing’s for certain: I’ll always give you the truth, whether you can handle it or not. I never sugar coat anything.

Nice is so overrated. I’d prefer brutally honest breakthrough to a “nice” rut any damn day of the week. If you’re the same way, then you've come to the right place.

17 Comments | Join the Discussion!

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Bob

Tuesday, August 13th, 2013

It's so funny the way girls immediately throw the "boyfriend" defense up. David just asks innocently about her puppy, and she immediately is programmed to shut him down with the "boyfriend" conversation stopper, automatically assuming "Oh, my god, a man is talking to me. He must want to rape, have sex with, use, or plunder me in some way, better shut him down immediately with the "boyfriend" bitch shield. That is why I would hate to be a pretty girl for even an hour. What a way to live, and think, in fear, contempt, and preconceived notions about men and worry about safety at all times...

stephen

Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

I think you're reading too much into that. She said it was her friends boyriends puppy.

dave310

Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

I could be wrong, but I think she said the dog belonged to her friend's boyfriend... so she wasn't claiming she had her own boyfriend. Just for the record.

KL Chang

Tuesday, August 13th, 2013

Well as I viewed the video, I didn't think too much about her words. I take her words as it was, just like how I do in real life. But I believe David had pointed out something important: get into the situation and detect directly what happens. At the first minute, there comes a girl who is less defensive but still no chemistry came out. And then the second minute, there comes a girl who immediately shuts the door (she literally shut her mouth). All one needs to do is to be themselves and let go anybody who closes the window, or who simply makes no connection with you, or who does not interest you. And this is a good demonstration of the reality that being confident would not make you like a super star surrounded by fans. It's merely to act in the way you like no matter what.

Rickk

Tuesday, August 13th, 2013

Spot on Bob, I hate how women do that crap.

Jo

Tuesday, August 13th, 2013

Dear David, I've recently become a follower of alot of your posts and there;s a question I have which I feel would help alot of people. I'd like some advice on the following, you've commented on it many times about not living in the past an making the most of the present and as hard as that is to do its something that's working very well. Over the past 12 years or so I've had some great success's. making my Olympic track and Field team travelling the world as a teacher and meeting some of the most amazing people and having fun with those people. However I've also reached 28 having never had an intimate relationship of any kind and its something that although I'm now to grips with and able to connect with and initiate interest easily and naturally I feel frustrated that I've missed many great opportunities with people who tried but i pushed away because of my own mindset of lack or inadequacy. The truth is I have been since my childhood a chronic worrier, Feelings of inadequacy have led me over the years to bury any admittance of an intimate self existing or even deserving to exist and I've managed to get by without it but theres always been a great deal of resenment under the surface. Reflecting back now this is something that started in my early life where family and school life reinforced the message that nothing was good enough, And yet I'm starting to come through that now, I have the confidence to tell people what I want, to ask people to meet me and to go on dates. My question to you is how do you look back with zero memories of anything intimate and move forward with optimism and excitement at close to 30 without letting a victim mindset sabotaging the great things about you? how do you generate core beliefs that you are genuinely worth it when your subconscious screams otherwise and gives you the emotions to go with it.....and lastly how do you go about the feeling of owing people an explanation as to your lack of experience....i suppose this is still the feeling that your not good enough kicking in? It would be great if you could write something in your blog about this as alot of people have alot of childhood baggage and I am aware through seeing it in friends also it can be the one thing that can stop you ever having the confidence or assertiveness to connect with somebody that you find beautiful. Its funny, often as men we can easily gain the interest of women we're not attracted to but when that one comes along that really takes your breath away if its been a lifetime habit that you feel your not good enough its easy to fall back and not stand up for what you want or honor your deepest feelings. Joseph

Mike

Tuesday, August 13th, 2013

You know Bob I got so sick of this I started calling girls out about it. If they pulled the "My BF whatever" I'd actually say something like, "Do you think I'm hitting on you? Are you that good looking?" Their faces were always a picture. Mind you I must say, I don't know how sitting waving like a fool is going to help shy guys get more confidence. The first time someone shouts something back at them they'll probably have a panic attack!

Bob

Tuesday, August 13th, 2013

yes I call them out on it too when they say the boyfriend bomb.I always tell them I didn't ask about your boyfriend I was talking to you.I didn't mention my girlfriend to you.I don't believe in sitting on a bench shouting at people either.that is bordering on Lunacy and ridiculous ness.I always believe in making conversation when it makes sense and in passing. But going out of your way to scream at people and draw attention to yourself is polish and will only make people think you are socially disabled.

Bob

Tuesday, August 13th, 2013

not polish meant to say foolish.I'm heading back to the ranch and using my voice recognition on my cell phone. Apologize for any grammar discrepanciesin advance.had a great time at the florida man pad.but can't wait to get back to the ranch and meet up with my oklahoma girls whoactually know how to dance and treat a real cowboy.

Brad

Tuesday, August 13th, 2013

With all due respect, the only thing this video makes me wonder is how long it is going to take until the cops show up. Three idiots sitting on a bench, waving and yelling ? How is that ever going to attract anybody ? I bet my life that everybody passing by, man or woman, thinks 'hey three drunk idiots on a bench', I better get out of here. This is worse than being approached by a beggar... The first girl is boring because the conversation is boring, and the girl probably thinks 'what the heck does this guy want from me ?'. There is no purpose in what David says, and he doesn't listen to what she says either. He sounds and behaves like a drunk hobo. Please don't ever do that, even hookers will run for the hills when you act like that. The second girl, the one with the puppy dog, well, she is surrounded by three guys she doesn't know, one with a camera in her face, I congratulate her for even sticking around. If anything, this video shows how to not ever approach a woman. Don't make a fool out of yourself.

Michael

Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

Hey JO, Welcome to the blog! :) You say, "However I’ve also reached 28 having never had an intimate relationship of any kind and its something that although I’m now to grips with and able to connect with and initiate interest easily and naturally I feel frustrated that I’ve missed many great opportunities with people..." Your not a computer where you can erase all the content start over again! Accept your past, it can never be changed! So what, you didn't have an intimate relationship at 28, it doesn't make you lesser of a person! Plus, you didn't settle for a woman that drove you insane for the sake of having a relationship, you were smart enough to stay out of those! Just focus on enjoying life and learning more...Men get better with age if they are the right track. And you my friend, are on the right track, keep it up! :)

Frank

Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

I actually liked everything about this video. Cuz even though David wasn't successful with these women, he's right: you're not gonna have chemistry with every single person, and I admire David, because he's not afraid to go out there and approach n say hello to people. Besides the girl said hello back when he was on the bench. It's all about being able to recognize these things and not trying to have a perfect conversation, because David was listening to the girl from Alabama, there just wasn't any deeper connection.

dave310

Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

The whole lack of chemistry thing was the most interesting part of this video for me. It's true, so many times we're chatting with a girl and it's not going anywhere or it's awkward and dull, but we'll keep pushing forward, hoping to make something happen. Then afterward, we tend to blame ourselves for the bad interaction and don't realize that sometimes the chemistry's just not there... and it's okay. As guys we're so focused on the end result, especially if the girl is attractive. We don't step back and realize that maybe it's not a good fit... (or the girl jus doesn't have much to offer) and we can choose to end the exchange and walk away, which is actually very liberating and empowering. It's funny how different men and women are when it comes to attraction... guys will put up with almost anything if a girl is hot enough. .

Bobby

Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

absolutely Dave. agree with everything.

Jo

Thursday, August 22nd, 2013

Hi Michael, Yes thank-you I think that's a really nice response.I agree with you alot as I said my confidence is now on the up as I get older but I just wonder why it took so long for that to happen as I sometimes felt that should of come about in my teens, There's other factors that most likely play a part such as I don't drink and I am by nature somebody who likes being creative and achieving and therefore really busy. I was very much different to my peers and when I was younger I used to take alot of that as excess baggage that I wasn't good enough but as time moves on now my perspective tells me that in reality I was the only one that wanted to create and dream big whereas I felt at school a lot just wanted to follow everyone else. Its a good response because sometimes and I'm sure this rings true to others but the issue I have is there seems to be an expectation in society that you've done certain things by a certain age and anyone that doesn't fit into that can be left to feel unworthy or like they are lacking as people even if they look OK and have interesting lives, Its like if your not part of the "I lost my virginity at 18 " brigade you can be like "what the hell happened during that time to make that not happen?" but often its because you were simply following your own dreams and hopes there's nothing negative about it. I think media is in part to blame for this attitude and it means that you end up with alot of people who just want to fit to this mould and who don't stand up and say this is who I am. this is being me being me. I guess that's fear. On the flip side there have been opportunities and in the moment I've just not felt connected with that person to take it beyond a friendship even though I've had the confidence to, Often in the moment I and others do what feels right and is in the most part right for them only to regret it years later. There's often the realization in the moment where you think....if by some freakish chance I got this person pregnant would I be happy standing by them if that outcome came about. More often than not its a no, I'm not talking about being in love just liking someone and thinking enough of them to not doubt your feelings too much. Finally one thing I did do was to leave my talents to see if I could get to grips with who I was and meet someone. Ultimately I did manage to date someone though it was only a beginning I didn't feel attracted to them and I suddenly realized there was more value in doing what you love doing and if you meet someone great but if not its OK to be happy with yourself and single. I just get a little frustrated when I meet people and they ask if I've been in a serious relationship and they say its odd for my age when i try to be honest. But then again, maybe that's their problem in their mind. Perhaps its their opportunity they're throwing away and often if i get that i think 1)they're not right for me and 2) they're not living in the moment because if they were what would the past matter? I mean I would never judge somebody for having relationships so it would be kind of hypocritical to be judged for not having them.Often the people who've found it confusing or unusual don't appreciate what its like to go through something or follow your dreams and I think its nice to be different and to get perspective from other positive people like yourself. Joseph

JOSEPH

Thursday, August 22nd, 2013

Lastly, I noticed David posted a blog on how to boost your confidence. I think this is perfectly appropriate for my question as it covers everything i spoke about in this blog. About reprogramming your mind. I've found you can only do that through experience. all the self talk in the world can't convince the monkey chatter unless you believe it through evidence in the real world. I just wanted to say that as I found this year I've come back to my sport to be better than ever before and I've started creating (slowly) real opportunities just by building each day. I went to watch a concert last week with some of my favourite performers and I reealized the only thing that separates these people is self belief. If you can apply that to both your dreams, goals and relationships I really do believe you can have it all. Its just it can take a long time to reprogramme childhood trauma but it can be done

Keith

Thursday, May 14th, 2015

David your soo right! I've already just started trying this at work (and I work in a warehouse full of mostly grumpy dudes) and simply waving and making a goofy gesture brings others outside their box. Yea some look at me weird but only because they can't imagine life outside their own anti social ways, and they're the worst anyway. Seeing others just get a glimpse of joy I can't wait to take this to the streets with beautiful women this weekend and just let go of my scarred ego. Thanks!

Be Proactive, Have Fun, And Talk To People

About David

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17 Comments | Join the Discussion!

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Bob

stephen

dave310

KL Chang

Rickk

Jo

Mike

Bob

Bob

Brad

Michael

Frank

dave310

Bobby

Jo

JOSEPH

Keith