Listen up, dudes.
Listen up, men.
Listen up, boys.
I’m about to give you the rule of being a dude. If you break this rule, you’re no longer going to be a dude. You’re going to be one of them.
Who’s “them?”
You’re basically a feminine man.
The #1 rule of dude-ism that you need to know is (I almost feel like the Big Lebowski here)…
Thou shall not throw another dude under the bus to the chicks.
Alright. Let me explain why.
A bunch of guys just sitting around in a backyard barbecue.
A bunch of guys just sitting around the campfire. Women are out collecting the sticks and the stones or whatever. I’m just giving you weird scenarios.
You’re all talking.
You’re really getting honest and open with each other.
And then one guys says…
Man, I don’t think I’ll ever get married again.
The other guys, the other dudes who he’s sharing beers with says, yeah, me either. Yeah, me either.
The one guys goes, “but your girl wants to get married.” And then the other guy says, yeah.
He goes, “the things we do for women.” All the guys laugh, and it’s all over.
But yet one of the dudes, one of them tells the girls that she’s with a guy that probably never wants to get married again.
I don’t know what type of chick brownie points this guy was looking for.
But I can tell you something.
It doesn’t work in the law of the dudes.
See, I never throw dudes under the bus.
Plain and simple, the majority of men out there would never get married again if their life depended on it after going through divorces. They do so because they compromise. They do so because they love the woman that they’re with. And they do so because it makes that woman happy.
Would I ever get married again? Not my choice.
If I could do it my way, maybe.
Only with a loving and caring partner.
Somebody who has my back.
Somebody who cares and adores and loves me as much I adore and care about them.
I don’t need to get married for the piece of paper.
But what if the woman that I was with so desperately wanted to change her last name?
Wanted to be with me.
Wanted to be married.
It was so important to her.
After discussing it and weighing the cons and pros and everything else, I may do it.
But it’s not a story that I need to complete at all. It’s not something that’s important because, to me, what’s important is the union between two individuals.
But I got to tell you something.
If you’re a dude, you do not throw other dudes under the bus ever.
I never repeat what my friends say.
Because, as far as I’m concerned, there’s girl logic and dude logic.
Women logic is purely based on emotions.
Dude logic is purely based on male logic.
We don’t ever expect women to understand male logic. We don’t expect women to understand and relate to male logic because they’re wired differently.
So many conversations are taken out of context between the sexes.
So, when you go and report back to the women —
You’re going to fuel the emotional side of them. You’re not going to get any chick points with them at all. As a matter of fact, they’re going to know that you’re their confidant from that point forward.
But in reality, the dude that you throw under the bus could have equally thrown you under the bus, but he chose not to.
Now, that’s not to say I’m not going to EVER throw a guy under the bus.
If I find out that a guy is cheating on a girl that I’m friends with or a women that I like, you know what? I’m going to talk to him first and go, listen, you got a week to come clean with her. You’ve got a week to clean up your act.
I’m going to give him the opportunity to communicate to her so he can come clean on his own because it’s not my job at all as a man to throw another man under the bus.
That’s all I need to say, because dudes stick with dudes. Women stick with women. But in true honesty, if you’ve got a real relationship that’s fully open and you’re both fully open with your ears, heart, mind, and soul and really listening to one another, none of this shit even matters.
As a matter of fact, all of this is just rhetoric.
It means absolutely nothing because, if you’re truly honest with the person that you’re with and you truly listen to each other, you’re going to overcome all these things, and you’re going to start to learn one another and do things with one another on that level.
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Vonnie
Monday, June 26th, 2017
Vonnie
Tuesday, June 27th, 2017