I get this question over and over again.

Everybody — women of all ages, shapes, cultures, colors — all want to know the same thing: does he like me?

Will he commit to me?

Does he want marriage?

Does he want children?

Is he serious about me?

Is he dating other people?

I get it. I understand it. I’ve been coaching women for 17 years, and I’ve heard this impending, terrible doom in women’s voices.

How does a man commit?

Well, let’s go through why a man wouldn’t commit.

Let’s talk about a serious relationship, or what you think is serious, but in reality isn’t serious at all.

I’m going to give you 5 signs that the relationship you’re in isn’t actually as serious as you think. So if you recognize these signs, you can stop waisting time on a man who will never commit and learn how to trigger the right emotions in the right man so he will commit to you for eternity.

#1. He vanishes.

He literally plays Mr. Vanisher over and over again. All of a sudden, you’re texting and going back and forth. You’ve gone on a date or two and everything seems to be okay.

Then all of a sudden, it feels like he was abducted by aliens.

He literally, absolutely vanishes on every single level.

He doesn’t text you for a week. He doesn’t call you anymore.

And then all of a sudden, he just pops back in with a random text message, just to let us know that he’s still around or he might be thinking about you.

I call this a man taking vacation from relationships with no warning at all. This is man who truly does not want a relationship. He truly does not want to be serious.

No matter what his words were to you, his actions speak louder than his words. If a guy truly cares about you, he will make room in his life for you, plain and simple.

#2. He flat out tells you he doesn’t want a relationship.

I know how obvious it is, but for some reason, so many women feel like they’re magic.

They can change that a man doesn’t want a relationship.

Of course he doesn’t want a relationship with just anybody, he wants a relationship with you.

So many women will play it cool and spend six months with a man who doesn’t want a relationship, thinking that they can change him or literally work their magic on him.

They figure if they’re patient enough, eventually he’ll give in.

But in reality, he’s not going to give in. He doesn’t want a relationship at all.

#3. His friends and family are ghosts to you.

So far, he hasn’t introduced you to a single one of his friends, or his daughter, or his family.

Or, as a matter of fact, anybody.

You’re four or five months in, and you’re still just his “thing on the side”.

He tells you, in time, he’ll introduce you to his daughter and his son. That I can understand, because a lot of people want to wait six months before the relationship becomes solid foundation.

But he doesn’t even introduce you to his friends or family. You are like this invisible person in his life.

And that is a huge warning sign the relationship is not serious.

#4. You don’t really know anything about him. At all.

He shares things with you, he tells you stories, but you don’t really know his relationship history. As a matter of fact, you barely know about his work, his job, or anything else.

He’s kind of secretive about things.

He hasn’t shared his childhood memories with you. He hasn’t shared his vulnerability, his insecurity.

As a matter of fact, he hasn’t shared much of anything with you. He listens to you, he shares bits and pieces, but if you had to write down who he truly is, you don’t really know the answer.

That’s a huge warning sign.

Because when a guy opens up to you, he shares his dreams, his fears, his hopes, his motivations, his interests, everything he’s investing in you…

…he’s committing himself to you! He’s giving himself to you!

Take a look at the things you know about him. Consider if you know who he really is.

#5. He can’t give you his weekends.

He puts in the bare minimum. He doesn’t take you out on dates, he doesn’t do anything with you on the weekends, and he tells you that he’s just, well, busy.

Busy being busy.

A man who truly is into you will give you his weekends.

As a matter of fact, you’d become a huge part of his weekends. The weekends actually become about you and him.

Look, when a man is serious about a woman, he’s 100% in.

Take it from me. When I’m serious about a woman, I’m 100% in.

I don’t think about it. I dive in, headfirst, feet following, heart following.

I’m 100% trying to get to know her. I’m texting her throughout the day. I’m speaking to her at night on the phone, because I’m showing her I want a relationship with her.

In Summary…

These 5 signs mean you’re probably with a man who will NOT commit to you:

  1. He vanishes
  2. He flat out tells you he doesn’t want a relationship
  3. His friends and family are ghosts to you
  4. You don’t really know anything about him at all
  5. He can’t give you his weekends

If you’re in a relationship right now with a man who has even 1 of these signs, well, that’s a big red flag.

And hopefully this article exposed the truth in that relationship. If you’re with a man who’s showing signs that yes, he’s ready to settle down and make a commitment, congratulations!

But if the warning signs are there, then you now know the truth. And you can stop waisting time on a man who’s not going to commit to you and learn how to find a man who is.