The other day, I got a great question from Trish. This is probably a situation that a lot of you experience on a regular basis.

In a perfect world, men would approach women. None of us would need to be on Bumble or Tinder, Match.com or anything else.

Normal approach, walk over, no fear of rejection, just do what a man should do: talk and flirt and so many other things.

In a perfect world.

So, here’s Trish’s question:

Hi, David.

I have a question, but first a little background.

I go to my local gym about four times a week and there is a guy that is there at the same time I am. I catch him looking at me, even staring. He almost tripped on his exercise machine one time looking at me and walking at the time.

This has been going on for about eight months.

My question is if a guy is looking at you and is interested in you, what will he do to let me know if he likes me?

I’d be more confident to smile back if he made it more obvious that he’s interested.

What are your thoughts?

I’ve got a lot thoughts here. And the big one is that eight months have been wasted.

Shame on you, Trish and shame on you, gym tripper.

You are both wasting so much time playing this fearful game.

It’s ridiculous how many people do this. They’re looking for validation and confirmation.

How much more validation and confirmation can a woman have if a guy is looking at her, staring, tripping on an exercise machine?

I remember one time I tripped while looking at a girl and she laughed and smiled right away.

I walked over to her and I  said, “Yeah, you  caught me looking.”

Don’t Wait for the Shy Guy

meet shy manThis man is very shy, very timid. He’s got no balls.

He stares and stares and stares.

He’s waiting for the perfect thing to say at the right moment.

He’s thinking so much about what to do, what to say, how to say it.

That’s probably the reason why he tripped over the exercise machine – he’s so in his head, he’s so not present, he doesn’t know what to do because he’s so intimidated.

As a woman, you can either sit and wait for more validation and confirmation, or you can gain the confidence and start taking control of your life.

What does it matter if you smile at him first? Why do you need the confidence boost? Because life is short, the more you waste time like this, the less chance of men ever coming over to you.

You see, 90 percent of the men in the world are wired this way. They’re wired to be shy. They’re wired to wait for validation or confirmation. They’re nervous. They’re not going to walk over. So you can continue to wait and wait and wait for eight months for this guy, seven month for another guy, or you can just say screw this.

Just smile at men when they’re staring at you. Catch ’em in the act. Show them that it’s okay for you to be approached because that’s what men are waiting for.

It’s like a game of chess. Everybody’s waiting for confirmation. Is it safe? Does this person like me? Are they interested in me? I mean, how much more interest does a man need to show? He’s not going to approach.

And the reason is that he’s too damn shy to approach. That’s the downside to approach and that’s just the way things are in life. So, there’s no reason to sit back and just keep waiting. The more you wait, the less chance a man is ever, ever going to do anything.

Stop Waiting for Him to Come to You

Take your life in your own hands. Smile. Make yourself available and watch the amount of men come up and approach you.

Too many women are waiting. They’re waiting for that guy to go and approach them. The fact is, they’re just not going to do it. Men are wimps. Call them whatever you want, they’re scared.

You have no choice but to take life into our own hands. It’s okay to show interest! Smile. Have fun. Smile at the guy at the gym and when he comes over, you may not even connect anyway, but at least you won’t wait eight months thinking about why he’s not doing something. You’ll start having more daily encounters in your life.