Bunny Boiling By David Wygant

I love what I do for a living. I enjoy all the exposure that I get. Very recently, I was featured in an article in The New York Times. It makes me feel really proud of what I do when people recognize me for my work and congratulate me on all the things I have done for single people.

Getting all this exposure is a plus. There are people who really enjoy what I do, and my message resonates with them. There are also people, however, who can’t stand my advice and think that I am a jerk.

I am okay with all of that . . . it comes with the territory. I have been doing this for almost ten years and I know that my message is not going to resonate with everyone.

There is another side to this, though, that I would like to share with all of you today. I want to tell you about my once a week encounter with the psycho bunny boiling woman who wants to live her own “Fatal Attraction.”

Since I don’t have a bunny, there will not really be any boiling here. At least once a week, though, I will get an email from a woman who saw me somewhere, or who read my book, or who read something I wrote. This bunny boiler will usually begin by sending me a picture accompanied by a really nice email.

Now I am single right now and open to anything, so if an attractive woman sends me her picture with a really nice email I’m going to answer it. That is what I tell all of you to do, i.e., be open to anything, because you never know where you are going to find your next connection.

So my emails are always sent innocently, but then there is something that triggers the bunny boiler to come out. The trigger can be anything from a harmless word I use, to a feeling that I did not email her back quickly enough.

Regardless of the circumstances, on a weekly basis I will get a woman who wants to boil my bunny. It’s hard to know what sets somebody off and what unleashes this anger. This is what I have learned.

When you’ve done nothing at all to someone except write them a nice email, and their response is to verbally attack you like a crazed Glen Close (the original bunny boiler in “Fatal Attraction”), you start to wonder when the water will start boiling. You run into the kitchen to make sure that the spaghetti pot is not boiling with a top on it. You start to listen for creepy music playing in your house.

The bottom line is this: When someone angry lashes out at you after you’ve done nothing to them, they are simply angry at themselves. You triggered something in them that causes them to boil the bunny on you.

I guess when you do what I do for a living, a weekly bunny boiler comes with the territory. My business manager always tells me that I should stop answering emails from strangers. I won’t do that. All of the greatest people in my life were once strangers.

Have any of you had a bunny broiler? Have you ever met somebody that seems so normal, and then all of a sudden you say something very simple like “Boy I hate bad drivers!” and they go off on you like you’ve committed a crime?

There are a lot of wounded people in this world. They may have been wounded by love. They may have been wounded by business failures. Whatever has wounded them, they have chosen not to heal themselves.

When you don’t spend the time healing yourself, the tinyist thing will set you off. If you confront someone on something and their response is to go off on you, it’s their frustration with themselves about which they’re really angry. They haven’t done the work to heal themselves, and they are not able to process and think like a non-bunny boiling person.

Keep the emails coming . . . you know I’m going to answer them. The minute you start boiling my bunny, however, I’m done with you.

When I was growing up my Mother used to say “If you kill something you have to eat it.” Now I didn’t grow up in the woods or anything, I grew up in the suburbs. So the things I was killing were ants and worms. Since I wanted to eat neither a worm nor an ant, I stopped killing anything. The last thing I want to eat is a boiled bunny.

I just found this on you tube thought you would enjoy this.