Over the last couple days, I’ve had (to say the least) some interesting comments in the blog. It’s been most interesting to see how people have responded to what I’ve posted and what they do with what I’ve said in my last couple blogs.

One of the blog commenters whose name I think was Brad mentioned in his comment wishing I’d get back to “deep topics” in the blog. In reality, though, what I’ve talked about the last couple days IS a really deep topic: overreacting.

Ask yourself how you are when you’re in a relationship with people. My opinion about much of what has been going on “behind the scenes” in the blog the last couple days is that it’s a reflection of how certain people conduct themselves in their own personal lives.

What happens when your significant other sits you down, tells you they have something about which they want to talk to you, and then they proceed to tell you how they feel? Do you immediately overreact and take it personally, when in reality it has nothing to do with you?

One of the main causes of couples breaking up is overreacting. Overreaction causes people to stop getting along with each other.

Take this example. Say your significant other tells you that they feel like they’re not spending enough time with their family. You take it personally, and think to yourself “Oh my God! I’ve been spending all this time with this person, and they don’t want to spend time with me anymore. What’s going on? Why don’t they want to spend time with me anymore?” This is called overreacting.

The world does not revolve around you. When someone shares their feelings with you, what I tell people to do is take a “timeout.” Call a timeout, and a take a few minutes to think about what they said. Process what they said. Look deep inside and see if what they said is about them (and only them).

Think about how what someone says affects you. Taking a look at what is really going on can prevent you from overreacting. Really think about what it all means.

It feels like people overreact quite a lot. When you overreact, you are never, ever going to be able to really hear what the other person is trying to say because you are always going to think what they’re saying is all about you.

People in a relationship should be able to voice their opinions, their feelings and their emotions to their partner. The other person should respect that and take time to process before reacting.

I tell people all the time to take a timeout before they overreact. When I say take a timeout, I literally mean go and do something else (like read or listen to something).

So whenever you feel that internal switch going on and you know you’re about to overreact, you need to take a timeout. Take five or ten minutes to process what’s really happening, and then respond.

Never speak in the heat of the moment because you will usually misinterpret what is really going on or what the situation is really all about. Also, if you overreact in relationships then your partner is never going to feel safe enough to tell you their deepest and most trusted feelings.